Agree in a kind way that you’ve noticed she has trouble remembering sometimes. Tell her you are there to help her remember. Say you have a good team of doctors or whatever. Keep it simple and say it every time she says she’s losing her mind. She won’t remember your saying it anyway. She just wants validation, acceptance and reassurance.
I always say:"Nah, but you do have brain damage. It isn't a moral failing. It isn't shameful. It's just brain damage" and then she calms down. But, that's just the way it works for my mom.
Many times when I've entered my Mom's house at 8 - 8:30 a.m., I find her despairing or in tears, saying that she's lost her mind. I hold her shaking hands and agree with her that yes, I see differences in her ability to remember and learn new things.
On top of that, I somehow (with much persuasion and cooperation on the part of her pcp's office) cajoled her into seeing her PCP twice this month. We are currently trying a new psych med on her, and this week as soon as I can get to the pharmacy, she will also be taking a new brain boosting vitamin.
My mom gets people's names mixed up too. She used to call me by my aunt's name before the dementia got really bad. Now she's taken to calling me by Dad's name.
My mother with dementia would say this all the time: I think I'm losing my mind, which in fact, she was. When a loved one is diagnosed with Alz/dementia and they KNOW something is wrong, it's a sad thing, really.
Mom would always think my children were babies when they're 29 and 36 years old now. She was always asking about the 'babies' and when we'd show her a video of her great grandson, she'd insist he was in the room with her, and begin looking for him everywhere.
You may want to get your wife a baby doll to love on. Many dementia/ALZ patients get great joy caring for a baby doll b/c it reminds them of when they were young moms with a purpose, caring for their young children. You can get one inexpensively on eBay here:
Just say to her that there aren't any children around at the moment, or something to that effect. Then distract her. That's your best bet. Or introduce the baby doll and she may get great joy from it as many women do.
Has she been officially diagnosed with Alzheimer's/dementia, or are you just noticing these changes in her and are assuming she has it? I would start with getting a diagnosis, then when she says that she thinks she's losing her mind, you can say, well if you remember honey the doctor did say that you have some form of dementia, so that is a pretty common feeling. But don't worry, I'll be right here with you. Or you can just say something like, I know how you feel, there's times when I feel like I'm losing my mind too. She may not remember from one day to the next what is being said, but perhaps just knowing that you're by her side in this might just be enough to keep her calm. Best wishes as you travel this road with your dear wife.
Your wife asked what about the children? Whose children did she appear to think they were, and what did she want to know about them?
What was the context?
What did you say in response?
There are two things, I suppose, that worry you about this: #1, why is she suddenly expressing concern about children who aren't real (?); #2, what are her feelings about losing her mind.
So investigate the first, try to find out what train of thought led to this false belief, follow it until you reach whatever connections with her real life there might be; and with the second, reassure her not that she isn't losing her mind (your profile page says she is living with Alzheimers/dementia, so she pretty much by definition IS losing her mind), but that you are there for her, all is and shall be well, and that even if she is she's still got plenty left yet.
and then she calms down.
But, that's just the way it works for my mom.
On top of that, I somehow (with much persuasion and cooperation on the part of her pcp's office) cajoled her into seeing her PCP twice this month. We are currently trying a new psych med on her, and this week as soon as I can get to the pharmacy, she will also be taking a new brain boosting vitamin.
My mom gets people's names mixed up too. She used to call me by my aunt's name before the dementia got really bad. Now she's taken to calling me by Dad's name.
Mom would always think my children were babies when they're 29 and 36 years old now. She was always asking about the 'babies' and when we'd show her a video of her great grandson, she'd insist he was in the room with her, and begin looking for him everywhere.
You may want to get your wife a baby doll to love on. Many dementia/ALZ patients get great joy caring for a baby doll b/c it reminds them of when they were young moms with a purpose, caring for their young children. You can get one inexpensively on eBay here:
https://www.ebay.com/itm/224405359464?hash=item343f9a0b68%3Ag%3A%7E04AAOSwbH1gYpsD&LH_BIN=1&LH_ItemCondition=1000
Just say to her that there aren't any children around at the moment, or something to that effect. Then distract her. That's your best bet. Or introduce the baby doll and she may get great joy from it as many women do.
Best of luck.
Temper
I would start with getting a diagnosis, then when she says that she thinks she's losing her mind, you can say, well if you remember honey the doctor did say that you have some form of dementia, so that is a pretty common feeling. But don't worry, I'll be right here with you. Or you can just say something like, I know how you feel, there's times when I feel like I'm losing my mind too.
She may not remember from one day to the next what is being said, but perhaps just knowing that you're by her side in this might just be enough to keep her calm.
Best wishes as you travel this road with your dear wife.
Whose children did she appear to think they were, and what did she want to know about them?
What was the context?
What did you say in response?
There are two things, I suppose, that worry you about this: #1, why is she suddenly expressing concern about children who aren't real (?); #2, what are her feelings about losing her mind.
So investigate the first, try to find out what train of thought led to this false belief, follow it until you reach whatever connections with her real life there might be; and with the second, reassure her not that she isn't losing her mind (your profile page says she is living with Alzheimers/dementia, so she pretty much by definition IS losing her mind), but that you are there for her, all is and shall be well, and that even if she is she's still got plenty left yet.