Follow
Share

My grandmother moved in with me almost 2 years ago and I hate it. Why she is currently living with me is complicated, but mainly no one else wanted to do it so I stepped up. I regret that decision every single day. She is a terrible person, she never liked me so I don't know what I was thinking trying to make this work. My mother is her main caregiver and she lives in an attached mother in law apartment. But my grandmother is in my side of the home. She does not have enough money to go to a home and no family member is willing to take her in and they all live so far away they can't even help. I am loosing my mind, I have children who are teenagers and are dealing with the stress she brings and they don't need that in their lives. Really I just need to vent. I know I am stuck with her until she dies and thinking about that makes me so depressed and angry. Anyone who is a caregiver to a rotten selfish parent I feel for you, This is hard. And I am very close to kicking her out into low income housing and she can figure out how to take care of herself.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing

5 Answers

Most
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
There are so many things that come into play on why we are stuck being her caregivers. I knew that this situation was going to be horrible from the second I said she could live with us. But she would have literally died alone in her home had I not stepped up. So either way I would have felt like the bad guy. Oh well such is life, eventually she will pass on. And this part of my life will be done with. Oh and we have called so many services to come help. They basically have no advice for us, she does not qualify for medicad. When we hire nurses to come in they always quit, we had meals delivered for her to eat and she refused to eat them. She was even placed in a home for a couple of months but due to covid in our area we had to take her out. We really feel like we have nothing else left to try.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report
It always amazes me when someone offers to care for a person "that never really liked" them, but somehow feels that things will get better. Well as you've learned(the hard way)it doesn't usually work out that way. Thankfully for you though, you are not stuck with her until she dies. If she has no money, then it's time that you apply for Medicaid for her, and then you work on getting her placed in the appropriate facility. An elder social worker can help you with all the details. Your children deserve better, and must be your number one priority. Get her out of your home ASAP. Best wishes.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report
I hope you won’t accept the idea that you’re stuck with this arrangement. It’s not healthy for your grandmother or you and your family. No judgment, but a tired, resentful caregiver isn’t a good one, and you’re understandably at that point. No one deserves to live with a “terrible person” It’s okay to let your mother and grandmother know you’re not able to continue and need another plan
Helpful Answer (2)
Report
How is your mother doing? What are the health issues? Could your GM move in with your mom or could they switch spaces?

google “Area Agency on Aging, Your City, Your State”.
Ask them for a needs evaluation for each elder. See what the alternatives are.

Sometimes just knowing you have a choice is helpful.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report
There are other options and you need to get grandma out of your space. This is not fair to your children. You are only as stuck as you let yourself be.

Does someone have her POA? She would qualify for Medicaid from the sounds of it. Low income housing? Does she have any health issues that would qualify her for residential placement?

Whose home is this? If not yours, you can move.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.

Recent Questions


Popular Questions


Related Questions

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter