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When I visit my dad at a Memory Care facility sometimes he is with it and other times not so much. One day he makes complete sense and will say he'd like to see his check book and will remember details of the day and accurately tell me the events.


Other days I go in and for example I went to visit him at 7:30 p.m. one night and he was sitting in the dining room all alone waiting for breakfast that is served at 8:00 a.m. He had just eaten dinner at 5:00. He said he didn't have dinner - the aide said he ate everything from the soup to the dessert. He has done this before or he claims he never had breakfast or lunch only supper.


I sometimes think I might be able to bring him home but he requires physical care that I am not capable of giving. (I often liken it to the cute babies in public that are cooing and laughing but you have no idea how much care they are until you have your own child and then you realize you didn't know how much care the baby is.) The doctor said my father will decline if I bring him home and with my health issues I would decline as well.


This disease is so strange and I have a hard time wrapping my head around it sometimes when I see my dad who one day acts pretty normal and the next day has no clue as to what is going on. I have a barrier in my brain that I can't get thru - I guess it's called guilt and denial.

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I told my mom that her MC used Teepa Snow materials, still thinking I could converse with her on a good day. She wanted to know if she was on staff there. No, mom, I think she lives in Arizona, but she is noted for her expertise, like you were in your field. Oh well, she dumped me too then.

Best laid plans. No good deed, all that. Jekyll Hyde. Every, single. Day.
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Reply to Segoline
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Take one day at a time. Don’t even consider bringing him home. There were times my mom and I could have a normal conversation and the next day she was telling me they moved the entire facility to Russia. One step and a time...seriously.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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Yes, it is a strange desease. Yes, this is how it works. He will worsen as desease progresses. He is in Memory care for a reason. He needs to be there.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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