How do you get everyone on same page?

I get that the MPOA needs to have her best interest in mind .I have hope to have her best interest since her mother was in coma for years . She doesn't Want to end that way . She ants to be allowed to pass like we all hope peacefully which I understand is for the lucky few . EMS So what is the legal steps if she has a POA and a MPOA . Who is in charge or are they separate each working certain areas .without communicating

Call up, or go to the hospital yourself to visit Mom. You are her daughter. See her.
Unless she tells you otherwise, imo.

She is your family member, maybe they may even tell you something about her if you are there.

Sorry you are distressed, anyone would be. It is harder if you do not know your rights or your mother's wishes. But you can find out.

Love and compassion is not a job, it is a gift. You have it.

Im just heart broken that I might get a text 9 hours later . When its a heart attack you never know If its the big one or not . IM scared I will miss that time with mom to help her pass over .It will be the toughest thing to do but its part of life . Does that job then fall on the medical directive person ?

The POA's job is to carry out the parents wishes. If Mom doesn't want her medical info known, then its POA's responsibility to keep it to themselves. But if Mom is competent, then she is still in control. She can list on HIPPA paperwork who is aloud to receive her medical information.

DNR has nothing to do with "listing" someone. Its a form were Mom list what she does not want done to keep her alive. Like resuscitation, not wanting a feeding tube. Its signed by a doctor. You may mean the HIPPA form. But, no one can be added or taken off unless Mom does it. If Mom is not competent then the POA can do it.

Problem with POAs is they get misinterpreted. Some POAs think they have full control but I don't see that as true. They are suppose to carry out what the LO wanted or they feel may have wanted. It ended up being a power thing. As POA, I kept my brothers in the loop. I am sure my Mom would have wanted that. Its a tool. Makes life easier. I was the POA because I was the closest child and the caregiver.

sorry very new to forum .. what are the code words for each title .. ty for taking time to answer .
POA power of attorney
MD medical directive ?
or just a link to the code words ?

The POA’s job is not to be the family spokesperson. Obviously every family should communicate but the answer is no, it’s not the POA’s job to notify everyone every time your mother goes to the ER. The POA’s job is act on your mother’s behalf and make medical decisions when she cannot do it herself. It’s their job to manage her medical affairs when she cannot. You aren’t going to like this but you aren’t entitled to know anything about your mother’s health. The POA must respect her privacy & should only disclose information she wants disclosed. If mom would want you all to know everything then the POA can tell you but again, it’s not part of their duties.

I think you should all get together and talk this out. If the POA won’t agree to notify everyone, again when mom wants them to know something, then maybe you can all agree on one person to be the family spokesperson and ask the POA to relay information to that person who can then pass it on to the rest of the family.

FWIW my BIL is POA for my FIL and he just sends a group text when he thinks his siblings should be informed of something. You could ask your brother the POA to do the same thing.