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My husband with dementia now does not want anyone to change his soiled diapers. Does anyone experience this with their loved ones? How do you deal with it?

As Cw writes, this is all too common behavior among people who suffer with dementia. But, it is a serious problem. Soiled incontinence briefs contribute to skin infections and in my husband’s case almost proved fatal earlier this year. A few suggestions—

If you are don't call them “diapers”. That might bring to his mind the image of a helpless baby. We call them “adult briefs” or even simply “underwear”.

When my husband returned recently from his latest bout of rehab for mobility therapy, he said the “pull-on” type of briefs were the easiest. We’ve tried to use the tab briefs with no success. It’s probably me, but I can’t for the life of me get them placed right. They don’t cover his—well, you know—and then it’s a big, wet mess. If your husband can stand, even with a walker, the pull on ones are the best.

You may also want to say, firmly but kindly, “time to change”. Don’t give him a choice and make it part of your routine.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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This is oh so common, I am fortunate that I never had to deal with resistance when caring for my mother.
Does he toilet at all? It might help somewhat to take him to the bathroom on a schedule so that he is using the diaper less - you will need to be hands on and supervise that. Pull ups are usually designed to tear easily at the sides so if it is soiled you could quickly tear it and remove it while you are in the bathroom, it will probably help if you can get him to sit rather than stand. You might find that the more traditional tab style briefs are easier to use if he won't cooperate.
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Reply to cwillie
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