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I can tell you what happened to my mother in law after her hateful mother and her despicable mother in law died. They were both mean women who treated my sweet mother in law horribly.

She found herself grieving for ‘what could have been.’ In other words, she grieved for what she most longed for but did not have with these self centered women in her lives.

So sorry that you were mistreated. Every cloud has a silver lining. That’s what some say anyway. I benefited from her experiences in life. She was so loving to me because she had promised herself that when her sons married she would never mistreat their wives like she was mistreated. She was loving to her sons and their wives and grandkids. I miss her.

One thing she said to me that was so special, (and there were many special comments) was that, “Most people learn WHAT TO DO from their moms. I learned WHAT NOT TO DO from mine.” Very telling comment, don’t you think?
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Hi stan - My sympathies on your loss. My mother passed in December 2018 aged 106. She made my life miserable from day one due to her mental illness and narcissism. I am finding my grieving process to be very different from what I have experienced after losing other people, The biggest difference is that don't miss her, don't long to see her again, I have none of those feelings. I have found that my grief over other people has been triggered by my mothers death, For example, I have grieved more for my father, who died many years ago, during the past 5 months,

Can you tell us more about what you are going through? I am sure there are others here who will relate.
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