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My question was placed in veterans benefits, which is not where I designated it. This is wrong. Very very wrong.

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If this forum receives financial consideration from a place for mom, it should be disclosed. I'll say it.

Allowing what is, essentially, spam undercuts the integrity of this site. There are so many helpful people here, with such banks of knowledge, it is a shame that this site may be colored by something not disclosed. That's wrong. Very very wrong.

Aging care, if you are getting a kickback from a place for mom,you should disclose. Otherwise, you are subverting us to a preferred provider by a place for mom, without prior disclosure. That's unethical. And I'll say it.
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worriedinCali Jan 2019
I agree with you 100%. On all points.

I also think it’s unethical to direct people to APFM and not mention that APFM gets paid for every person they refer to a nursing home/AL/assisted living facility that ends up becoming a resident. I saw the “expert” mention something to someone about not worrying about the fees because APFM gets paid by the facility. Yes, they get paid a finders fee. The way she said it, it wasn’t disclosed properly IMHO. APFM gets paid a finders fee so their goal is to get you into a facility, any facility. They will do whatever it takes so they can earn their fee! That means they have their best interest in mind.....
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Segoline, the trouble is that A Place For Mom lady is listed among AgingCare's experts.

I have to say that what makes me really grit my teeth most is that under her name and job title she's described as APFM - for all the world as though APFM were some kind of professional accreditation, rather than just her company's initials. Cheesy.

Anyhoooody, there is a business relationship. The mods may not find it straightforward to boot her off.
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Segoline Jan 2019
You know, allowing her the designation of APFM, like you say, is some special accreditation in elder care is so transparent and so tacky.

I am so gobsmacked by this. It sheds terrible light not only in this forum, but APFM and any other placement agency. It's embarrassing and so unethical.

Perhaps i should have registered as IWFBALF

I work for big ass law firm. Good Lord.
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I honestly thought that everyone here that participates in this forum regularly knew there was sponsorship... and that it would be more or less directly pointed to at different times in different threads.

Nothing is happening in elder care in the U.S. without money being involved in some way. It's a huge and booming business in the U.S. and will only get bigger. The agency that briefly provided in home caregivers to my grandmother also hired an "expert" case manager to say that my grandmother needed to go to an assisted living. The agency was paid for the placement, and was also still able to put their own caregivers into the new assisted living. My grandmother's doctors said not to do the move, social workers said not to do the move, and they did anyway... because of money. And my grandmother was dead 45 days later because she lost 30 pounds in a month after she was moved.

I recounted all that horrible stuff to say this: don't trust anyone in this business who recommends a placement, or service, unless you are certain they're acting in your best interest. Sorry to be so alarmist, but... this is the state of this industry right now in the United States.

Hire an independent case assessor if needed.

My 2 cents.

And yes, any partnership or sponsorship for this website should be upfront and disclosed in such a way that anyone visiting here would understand the relationship. There will still be plenty of people who wish to use the services of sponsors, but the whole "100% free, no hidden costs" bit is... not the whole picture, imho.
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Of course they are sponsored. But these posts are so obviously pushing APFM without giving any further advice. That is different from before. It IS all about the $$$.. I agree with your recommendations and everything you have said. I find it sad.
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Wow! I reported this previous answer of mine and it has been quarantined or removed! Really?!

"I contacted admin yesterday as I found her to be quite intrusive and recommended APFM on every post she wrote. Though admin may be very well aware of it as she has the "EXPERT" label associated with her name.

If you want to contact admin, 

https://www.agingcare.com/aboutus

I will also report my post as being inappropriate, that may get quicker attention."
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NYDaughterInLaw May 2019
What is APFM? I'm not sure I understand what is going on.

Okay - APFM = A Place For Mom but I'm still not sure what's going on.
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Yes, I know. I went to the 'panel' and found her there.

The financial relationship should be disclosed. I have recommended this forum on another board, of which I am a member, which has many boomer kids dealing with, or about to, aging parent issues. I believe I will have to append that recommendation.
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The rules used to be "No Advertising" and when anyone did their post was removed.
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Many of us came here looking for real stories from real people. I wanted to know what others experiences were. I wanted advise from people who had been in the same or similar situations. I think a lot of people come here for the same reasons. So that’s really why I dislike seeing APFM advertised here. I feel it is spam/advertising. If I was faced with the situation of having to place a parent in a nursing home and I wanted to know how to make it go as smoothly as possibly and how to overcome the guilt, I would want advice from people who have been in the same situation. I would be really upset if an “expert” replied and directed to me to contact an advisor at APFM! Especially when they are being compensated....

i hope whoever is running the show here, is reading all the feedback being given here.
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Has anyone an update on Marlis Powers and her husband Charlie [who has dementia]? I noticed it's been over a year since I saw her last posting. She is one of the "bloggers" here.

And I haven't seen anything current from Rick Phelps or David Hilfiker who both have early onset memory issues. I hope they are doing ok.
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What really bugs me about this is that APFM has continually posted links and phone number to reach them.

Yes Carol is an expert, we have not seen her in a long time. She has a business is some sort of elder consulting, but I have no idea what it is. That is as it should be!
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