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Any suggestions, ideas to help maintain fingernails of member that has FTD-BV? Member does not like it being done, and tries to pull away.

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My mother wouldn’t let me cut her toenails. Medicare pays for a podiatrist somI would take her every 3-4 months, she loved the attention.
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My mother with dementia who was a witch prior used to be attentive to her nails. Now her hygiene is totally neglected and all effort have been impossible or refused. If anyone dares to suggest "spa day" I will hunt you down!
We are, most of the time, and with enough effort that I worry about the stress on both myself or father, able to get her every two weeks to the hairdresser she has seen for years and years...he is now in one of those places where everyone is an owner with their own space. Someone there was willing to do her nails and we coordinate the appt times so it is mercifully only one trip and under the same roof.
And then the proverbial you know what hit the fan because the nail person (and keep in mind the important fact that mom now with the dementia does NOT want polish ONLY nail filing!) decided to move FURTHER AWAY. ONLY 7 minutes to her, much more hassle for us. ANd she knew the circumstances and gave very little notice.
We found another person under the same roof but for lack of a better term, she appears to be a little snot with little compassion. I mean come on, who among us with our comprehension of the issues wouldn't just file someone's nails if we could for a nominal amount or even NOTHING to just do it as a kindness while on this planet? AND SHE had the nerve to tell ME to TEXT HER as she doesn't always see her emails.
SO I posted on our local Next Door website, making the huge mistake of revealing dad's age and that he was driving which brought all the ageist busy bodies out of the woodwork to chastise me for being SO HORRIBLE as to let someone of his age be driving and how he was going to kill someone. However, by the end of the day, god bless him, her own licensed hair guy realized to just file them, HE could do it. I told him I owed him a thousand cheesecakes:-)
BTW, each holiday season he usually posts a sale on gift cards. We get mom one, so he has the money up front basically, and then he just deducts as appropriate for services provided. Then dad doesn't go whiney because of how little time was spent on taking care of mom or how outrageous the cost of her nails is. My response which falls literally on deaf ears is THEN DO IT YOURSELF. Here's the new math for me: IF she would tolerate an aide, it would be $20/hr minimum with a 2 hour minimum. So even at $18-20 for the monthly nail trim + tax and tip, it's still less. Good luck. This is so much a needed service and people don't realize it. I even mentioned to her guy about contacting a big salon here that has done some charitable work and suggested a day or morning to care for those afflicted with the dementias and even possibly their caregivers, even at a discounted rate...Good luck...PS mom does get to the podiatrist every so often for her disgusting toenails
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You can also get a battery powered drummel to file down regular nails not the thick ones.
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gdaughter Feb 2021
dremmel... watch for sales at home stores. one model has alight at the end, rechargeable. keep your hair tied back.
love,
a dog mom
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I could not trim my husband's toe nails. Too thick. Took him for pedicure and he LOVED it. Going every 6 wks now. He is 86 with alzheimers. The pedicurest makes over him and rubs his feet. He is in heaven and his feet look great! $30 every 6wks. Worth it to me.
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spoonielife Feb 2021
My mother has the same problem, she loves pedicures!
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Is this a family member of yours? If you are an aide, you should not be doing this. In my State toenails and fingernails are not done by CNAs, LPNs or RNs. For toenails a Podiatrist is used. For fingernails, I always trimmed Moms with a nail clipper and filed. Tothill has given some good suggestions.
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My daughter hates to have her nails cut, so she uses a glass file to maintain them.

If you LO had hard nails, try cutting them after they have been soaking in water. Can they help with the dishes to give them a nice soak?

If they pull away instead of extending their arm towards you hold it close to their body, it is hard to pull away.

Promise a nice hand massage once you are done and if your LO is a woman perhaps a bit of pretty polish.
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