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Dementia is basically the worst enemy to arrive in a household! Do not think anything is going to be "easy" about this disease, and your health is going to suffer because of it, unless, you put your grandmother in a care facility, so both your mother and you can deal with both of your challenges. Don't even think about going back to work. This would be a disservice to any employer. Give grandmother melatonin for sleeping all night - you can buy it at any drugstore, does not require a prescription, and is non habit-forming. You could take it too as well as your mom! There will be an end to this stressful time, and you will be stronger, as you have already shown you can handle much! Hang in there...
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You are doing the right thing don't take comments personally she would be horrified if she realized how she is treating you
My wife Wendy I have to wake to take to toilet at 3 a.m.
Wendy never ever swore before she got her Dementia and was horrified to hear the F word C word and B word now at 3.00a.m she swears like a trooper
I know it is not my wife and just let her carry on.
Please give yourself a Big Hug and continue
Best Wishes Kevin Parken
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I feel the same, trying to start full time work again, but it is hard with constant interruptions, gaps to fill in and new solutions to find. A good full time caregiver is helping me and I shall delegate 100% of the care to her this month so I can try and get my life back. I was alone with my ill mother in the past 3 years trying to set her up and find the right caregiver so now that I found her I should be able to go back to my previous life. What makes me angry is still having to fill in and still not finding enough time to focus on myself. It obviously will never get back to normal, so I guess I have to live this with it, trying not to get angry.
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I just want to offer my support and huge hugs for you. How do I deal with anger? I vent to my friends, my counselor, I write about it in a notebook, I scream in my car when I'm alone and I come to this website. I should be exercising, walking, but so far, I'm not. You are not alone. It is very stressful to have your world turned upside down. I have someone I care for who is not always the kindest person either, and it hurts a lot. If you can try not to take your grandma's words personally it will help. I know that is hard. I'm working on that philosophy myself. I'm sure you are doing the best that you can. Some situations are just too difficult for one working person to handle. You are a good caregiver. Don't question yourself, your intent is to be there for everyone, but you do have to try and be there for yourself too. You can't beat yourself up with guilt, what you are doing is incredible and generous. I'm sure others will chime in too. Keep visiting this site, you'll find it gives you strength.
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