He gave a large sum of money to someone wanting to be kind and because he thinks he can afford it. When I saw the debit on his bank statement I questioned the bank and they cancelled his cheque book. How do I tell him? He will be angry and upset at the loss of control. I have POA but live on the other side of the world. He suffers memory problems and is isolated.

Find Care & Housing
Yes. It is quite honestly one loss after another, all control, then dignity. He WILL be angry. The way you explain it is with honesty about what happened, about his good intentions but the bad results for him, that you are protecting him and you understand that to him that feels like the loss of his control, his dignity, himself. That you are sorry. The isolation, not being able to see you has to make it even harder.
Please notify any charge companies, put a freeze on accounts at Experian, TransUnion and I forget the name of the last credit company. I am hoping there is someone in your Dad's area now to watch over him a bit. There is no way to make this not painful for him. Like Grandma 1954 below I am worried about his life in general at this point.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to AlvaDeer

Who is caring for him?
Has he been diagnosed with any form of dementia? You mention memory problems but is it more than that? I have "memory problems" when I forget where I put my keys...but I know what the keys are for and where and how to get where I want to go.
Has he made other questionable decisions?
What about his bills and other household matters?
Is he able to maintain the household?
This might be the proverbial Tip of the iceberg!
Tell him the band stopped the account and that you must be in control of the account.
How will you handle his spending money? Money for food and incidentals? A Debit Card might work if he can handle that (remembering a PIN)
You need to think of the possibility that you might have to consider either Assisted Living or Memory Care for him if he is alone and there is no one that is able to help him on a day to day basis.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Grandma1954

Great answer from Barb.   Is he concerned about getting petty cash?  Can you get him a debit card with a low limit?
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to FloridaDD

YOU didn't cancel his cheque book; the bank did because they see that his judgement is impaired and they dont want to be held liable.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to BarbBrooklyn

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter