I placed my dad in a memory care unit in 10/18/18. He lived with me for a while. I had to bring him from out of state to live with me. His drivers license was taken away and that’s when he decided to come live with me. He was showing signs of dementia when he lived by himself and I knew something had to be done because he was a threat to himself and others. He was a demanding person and a very regimented person. He got sick in July, 2018 and went into hospital and then went to rehab. He lost almost 20 pounds in three weeks at the rehab. The doctor told me to enjoy my time with him thinking that he would not make it for too much longer. I took him out of the awful rehab place and back to the hospital and found he had a blood clot in his lung. He went back into a different rehab for another six weeks and while in rehab he was hallucinating and the doctor deemed him incompetent to make any decisions.
I placed him in a memory care unit due to the care that he needed at the time and I physically couldn’t take care of him because I have fibromyalgia and my diabetes has gotten worse with everything going on.
He now is somewhat better with the dementia. He can remember things that apply to himself but hardly has any rememberance of past events or people he knew for years He couldn’t even remember my moms name. She passed away 22 years ago and he talked about her all the time. The doctor told me I could bring him home but he would decline in his health and I would decline in my health. I look at it as a 50-50 chance to go either way. I’ve kept him at the facility because I don’t know if I can care for him the way I did when he was demanding and needs help with everything.
Either I or my husband go to the facility everyday to see him. I have a daughter who doesn’t help me out but is all into her husbands family and helping them out with their illnesses. She tells me what a busy schedule she has and how stressed she is. So I don’t look for help from her. She did tell me one day after her mother-in-law died that maybe she could help me out a day a week with my dad. I said great that would be so helpful! She then backed down by saying she didn’t know what day she could do it and has never said another word. All I can say is thank heavens for my husband and his support.