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I've been here caring for my 84 yr old mom for 5.5 years and my name isn't on house and she has no will or trust

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Your mom can make a Will, possibly even if she has diagnosed dementia. The lawyer who creates the Will decides if she is competent to sign. Consult an eldercare attorney; the first consultation is usually free.
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Reply to Fawnby
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Your States laws for how after death assets (like a house or a car or land) can successfully transfer their title will determine just how this can be done.

States vary on all this….. Some allow for small estates affidavit, some allow for a Muniment of Title, some require full-on traditional probate.
And by&large doing the paperwork needed for whatever approach to after death asset distribution is not really a DIY. Its attorney work as the wording on documents have to be done correctly for the title to transfer successfully. If your mom really truly owns her home outright - so no mortgage or any other lending that has that house securitized to the lend - she can get a elder law or maybe even a family law attorney to do a will for her that names you as her sole heir and as the Executor for her after death Estate if actually opening full-on probate is what’s needed as per your States laws.

fwiw if there is no will, it’s considered an “intestate” death. States will require for intestate death for heirship to be determined in some fashion for assets of the deceased to be legally distributed. For many States, this ends up meaning you will have to hire a probate attorney who does the lineal heir research and filings needed to determine the “lineal heirship” that you are a valid heir. It’s either mom uses her $ now to get her will done or you pay later to establish heirship.

on a related topic….. If you are kinda dependent on your mom’s income to cover household costs, please pls realize her Social Security income and any other retirements she has will stop completely upon her death. If you are not yourself able to file for Social Security retirement income and you have stopped working and making a salary 5.5 years ago, the loss of moms SSA $ could put you in dire straits unless you have your own savings/investments. If this could be you, do what you can right now to have mom pay to do her legal and do any repairs that house needs while she has her own income to pay these costs. Also Mom can pay you to be her caregiver…. she would do a personal care contract with you to pay you each month & this document can be done by the attorney who does her will. It could be a small amount, like $500 a month. But it will add up to give you some $ to be able to save and have on hand once her income is gone. This is a harsh reality some caregivers face as they quit their jobs to live with a parent and become financially dependent on them. If her home still has a mortgage (horrors), your having $ will be beyond important as the mortgage will have to be dealt with fairly quickly. Hopefully this financial situation is not you, but if it might be….. do what you can now to prepare for this.
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Reply to igloo572
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Is your mother medically diagnosed with dementia? If not then seek an elder care attorney for your mother to make a Will, assign POA and MOLST/healthcare directives immediately.

If she would need Medicaid long term care then the sale of the house will either occur as Medicaid Estate Recovery Payment that Mediciad will do through Leins on her estate upon death. Or she may need to sell her house to fund her long term care costs. This sale must be at fair market value or will be penalized if withing the five year look back the Mediciad requires when applying for long term care benefits.
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Reply to AMZebbC
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igloo572 May 5, 2025
If LTC Medicaid NH placement ends up happening for the mom, the mom can continue to keep her home. She can do a “right of return” filing, so house stays in the mom’s name & the OP can continue to live there& without paying rent as she was the old caregiver. Although the big sticky in this is the mom will have no $ to cover any of house costs due to LTC Medicaid Share of Cost income paid to the NH requirements. So all property costs fall to the OP to pay for from her own $. Then after the moms death, the OP as she was taking care of her mom and did not have her own full time job those past 5.5 years, then the OP can file for the caregiver exemption to Estate Recovery. There is paperwork and outside documentation needed to make it work. But she’d have that option. Like they need a statement from the elders physician or social worker that the care provided by the caregiver was necessary and it kept the elder from going into a NH earlier.

Caregiver exemption can be done. But they have to have their own $ in some way to pay the many costs on that home. Property taxes have to be paid. Utilities as well. Repairs & maintenance dealt with in some way. Being an unpaid caregiver for a parent - unless you have your own financial resources - runs a lot of risk.
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At this point there is no guarentee. If Mom dies without a Will, you can become her Administrator. Your responsibilities will be the same as an Executor, difference being, the State determines who inherits her estate. If you are an only child, you will inherit. If siblings, they too inherit.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Inheritance (if there's any left when she passes) will go to the closest relatives. That would be you, and any other siblings. But if your Mom requires Medicaid before she passes, there will be a lien on the house that will need to be satisfied by the next owner. If you have siblings you will probably share ownership of the house.

If your Mom wishes for you to have the house she should make a Will now. If you have siblings, I hope she discusses it with them so they can hear from her own lips the reason she left the house to one and not the others.
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Reply to Geaton777
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After death, the house will go into probate. Then it will be up to the judge who the house goes to. I agree with the previous advice, get a will done, fast. You don't need to go to a lawyer. I bought WillMaker software and drafted my own will. You will need to have the signatures witnessed, and have those witnesses also sign, but that is not a big deal.
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Reply to olddude
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It’s not too late to have a Will done. I highly recommend getting this done as soon as possible.
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Reply to JuNos5
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JoAnn29 May 5, 2025
If thevperson has Dementia, no Will can be done.
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