My brother is coming to visit and to give me a respite. How do I keep him from giving my Dad too much beer?

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Drinking is a disease in my family. I had to address it personally a number of years ago but both my brothers drink heavily still and my father did (and fell) until i got him in ALF. Last time my brother came, dad had bottles hidden in his drawers when he left I confronted my brother but he said it wasn't him. i had a caregiver (who i terminated for lots of reasons) that very well might have done it, but it was still suspicious. I want so much to have a few days off, but when dad gets alcohol, he takes steps back. My nephew is coming with him, but i don't know his drinking status, although when we were close, he stayed away from alcohol. What should i do? I can talk to him, but really, talking to an alcoholic in denial is like talking to a fish. Advice?

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Jeannie how do we know he isn't writing from jail?

Capt what time does the bar open. I"ll be there to buy you a pint.
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It group, you mention "evidence based medical science/research" and "best practices" throughout your posting. Would you care to cite some of the refences from the relevant academic journals? (not Google) I am sure there are some readers who would be interested to discover how this information relates to the original question "How do I keep (my brother) from giving my Dad too much beer.
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And, by the way, if Captain did half the things he writes about he'd be writing from jail. He has been a conscientious and creative caregiver for two elderly relatives. We've learned to screen out his hyperbole. :)
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Captain, very funny........................LOL!!!!!
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itgroup, it really isn't off-topic to ask for some personal background. I often suggest that posters fill out their profiles, because it helps us communicate better. Is the person writing a scientist in the field being discussed? A caregiver of a spouse? A child trying to care for a parent from a great distance? This kind of information puts the response in context. Please don't take it as a personal insult to be asked. We just like to know and the site provides a place to put this information.

I do agree with many of your statements, about evidence-based treatment, for example, and I suspect your listed resources are informative. And a broad perspective is legitimate. But, no, it didn't really help me to figure out what you think the original poster should do about respite care. And that is a specific topic many of us are keenly interested in.
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I'm bettin' "hammered" is in your wheellhouse and you were rollin' that way long before you logged onto this site. ;-) Encouraging you to sober up, then check out resources listed in 'all knowing sack of drivel'. By the way, Cappy...Thank you for 'allknowing' compliment. Lol...I'm not inclined to be nearly as complimentary of you;-).
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itgroup ,
i havent had a drink in three weewks but after reading that allknowing sack of drivel im ready to get hammered .
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This is a tough problem especially since it not being your own home you can't control who comes and goes. My mom enjoys a glass of Bailey's occasionally so I brought a bottle to her nursing home and they keep it behind the nurses station and offer her a wee bit now and then. A very wee bit.

Its too bad you couldn't make some kind of similar arrangement with the ALF where your father is. But if he has a drinking problem as you say a wee bit probably would not suffice and I guess you can't reason with your brother.

I'm sorry for your problem. Good Luck!!
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Hmmm Veronica the respectful request by site moderator, "Please stay on topic", is posted on the top the comment field -on my screen, anyway:-). Just, fyi, "backup information about 'her personally'" is an example of what constitutes as 'off topic'. Apparently...size 'really' doesn't matter ;-).
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Hmm Jeannie another poster without any backup information about her personally. I think I will keep my size 10s out of this.
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