My sister lives on the other side of the country from me and while we've never been close I am all the family she has. I am married and we have 4 grown children. My sister is divorced and lives alone. We always include her in our holiday get togethers and other than that we may visit her once a year at the most. I doubt if she will be able to travel to join us this Christmas. Our family has all noticed a decline in her memory and ability to manage simple tasks over the past few years but about a year ago when her special guy friend died things began to get much worse. She is easily confused. She can't manage her checkbook, asks neighbors how to write checks. When I was recently visiting she asked to help and yet couldn't manage to set the table. I'm quite certain she can't manage the stove or the microwave. She let me do all the driving while we were visiting and gave me accurate directions to all the places she routinely goes, in many cases telling me more than one way to get there. Many of her neighbors have contacted me with their concerns. When my husband and I and a wonderful friend tried to gently suggest she see a doctor, she got very aggressive saying that she felt ganged up on and refused to discuss any kind of support. She has resources that would allow her to stay in her home with proper support but she refuses to see a doctor. She has told us that she already did so and he said there is nothing wrong. I am fearful that she will get locked out of her house, or get lost and yet I have no clue how to help her. I am quite certain she is very scared as both of our parents suffered from dementia. But burying her head in the same is not helping. She has always been difficult and not a particularly nice person and really has no BFF. Even her friend who has been amazing in the support is doing so out of sense of "what's right" not because she cares for her. Everything I read is about how to help a parent with dementia. I'm not willing to be responsible for her care but I do want to help her get the help she needs.