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My grandma is 78. She lived in her own home with my uncle until he passed away unexpectedly in November. I had been trying for years to get her to move into an assisted living facility but she would not. She was unable to properly clean the house and my uncle did not clean up after himself and the house was not livable and is still not livable. When he passed I could not leave her there and brought her home with me. My dad would not take her or help me with her, nor will my brother. I did not realize exactly how bad off she was mentally. I have taken her to her doctor and talked about what is going on and she blows me off. She has her on anxiety meds and now seroquel but nothing helps. She has delusions that people are talking about her, hiding her things, and that we hire a quartet to sing. She gets highly agitated and bangs on doors and wakes us up. She says I am going to have a deformed baby because I talk with witches and devil's. I don't know what to do anymore. I have an appt with a neurologist for her in March, that was as early as I could get it. She gets a social security check and does not qualify for Medicaid. Her home has a lien against it because she took a loan out in 2005 to do repairs and ended up losing her job due to layoffs that same year and she defaulted. She had filed bankruptcy and almost lost her home. They just got out of bankruptcy and she has a loan she pays on 475 every month and still owes $56k. I cannot afford to pay the difference of her bill if she went to a home. I don't know what to do. I work from home and I am going to lose my job because of the constant outbursts. She constantly packs her stuff up everyday and says she is leaving. I have called social services and they said they cannot do anything unless she is a threat to herself or others. I have had to go on blood pressure meds since taking care of her. I don't know what to do. She is falling more, I have taken her to the hospital because of her falling and talked to her Dr about it as well. When she gets in a state she will walk without her cane or walker. What do I do?

Next time she is in the ER refuse to take her home stating she needs more care than you can provide. The social worker will have to find appropriate placement for her.

Has she been checked for a UTI?
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Reply to gladimhere
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Seems your PCP is doing nothing and is out of his element. You need a neurologist to deem her incompetent, which u have an appt for. Gma is going to lose her house one way or the other. I would stop the payments and allow the lender to foreclose or turn it over to them.

Gaurdianship costs a lot of money. Really, I don't think you should take this on. Its really your Dads responsibility to get her to a safe place.

I guess other than the house she has no assets? Why do you feel she does not qualify for Medicaid. Is her SS check more than the Medicaid cap? If not, the house is not counted as an asset. Once on Medicaid her SS check will be used for her care. Nothing can be used on the house. The taxes, utilities, insurance will all have to stop being paid. Unless a family member wants to pick up the bills but they will not get reimbursed if the house sells.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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They also sent me a packet about guardianship as I do not have poa or anything for her.
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Reply to anonymous885219
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Ywe, I have told them she cannot live alone and that she is falling. They said unless she was threatening me or trying to harm herself, or wandering, they could not really do anything. Her home is 20 mins away from mine and the power is turned off as well as water. I could not let her stay there because I would be afraid something would happen before they got over there and stepped in.
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Reply to anonymous885219
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How far away is her home?

If she lived alone, you could report her as a vulnerable elder to APS.

So, she clearly IS a danger to herself. Did you tell social services that?
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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