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My mom is in assisted living and everyone is kind and helpful, but one caregiver is especially good. She seems to have a little more involvement with my mother and she has tipped me off more than once when she felt something needed my attention. I've expressed my appreciation to both her and her supervisor, and I try to do something special for the entire staff every so often. But I feel like this person is just a little more concerned about my mother's well being. I'd like to do something for her, but I guess I worry about excluding the others. Any suggestions?

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Thank you everyone. I totally understand that it's important to keep any "gift" private. I've thought about inviting this person to lunch (my treat). I always tell her how much I appreciate her efforts and I've told her supervisor that everyone has been helpful (they have), but this person has been extra good with my mom. Honestly, I appreciate everyone. It's a difficult job and the elderly can be very demanding. I could never do it and I feel that my family is extremely fortunate to have such a nice assisted living facility for my mom. I have arranged to have pizza and sandwiches delivered several times from my mom to all of the employees (their supervisor makes sure all the shifts are included). These people are a Godsend!
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It may be against the rules, but I have given special caregivers a thank you card with a cash reward. I was discreet and insisted. You can count on their discretion as well. Some of these jobs do not pay very well. As when they have a birthday, that may make it more casual.
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Go to one of those places that engrave and have a little trophy made up, give it to the facility and ask that it be put on display, in recognition of 'going beyond the call of duty,' from a grateful family. Even better, make sure it's one of those with a plaque that can be modified and set up a small fund so that other families can add to it.
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I had a job that did not allow gifts given to workers. Verbal thanks were always appreciated. as were hand written thank you notes. I would think that singing that caregivers praises to their supervisor, in their presence, would mean the world to them. That would be the ultimate compliment.
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Yes. I always enjoyed having letters written by family members acknowledging the caring manner in which I gave their loved one(s). This will benefit that caregiver you admire, and perhaps might inspire others on staff to do better. Wonderful of you to recognize great staff!
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Gr8 ideas from geewiz. And whatever you do, you must keep it private to avoid getting anyone in trouble for showing favoritism. Little thoughts along the way and a gift after the passing of your loved one could certainly be in order. What about if the patient outlive the care worker does the care worker moves on to a different job? Be sure you get the workers private cell number so you can make contact that occur.

When my dad was in the nursing home nearly an hour away from our house, my mom drove to him every other day and stay the entire day. She fed him as he would not eat without her coaxing. One male CNA took a liking to my dad and took note of the problem n even though its not only was it not his assignment, rather he was encouraged not to do this, but he took it upon himself to see that my dad got something to eat on the days my mom wasn't there. Now, this guy's wife also work in the kitchen at the nursing home and they took the bus to and from work because they didn't have a car.At least once a week my mom drove them home, feeling it was a small gesture and it was won the nursing home did not object to. We also took in muffins with cream cheese and jam, brownies, cookies or donuts (ALL SO HEALTHY, AAARRRGGGHHH!), something for everyone at least once a week. My dad was there 16 months before he died. Afterward, we had to go down to handle some business and we hung around until the end of the couples shift and offered to take them home as usual. We gave them a check for $1000 I figure my mom and I had come to because she said what he did for my dad was priceless. The guy was speechless, started crying and and the check to his wife whose mouth dropped open. They said no one had ever done anything like that for them before. They were so appreciative but we told them it was our pleasure because they had been so giving on behalf of my dad.

These folks are overworked and underpaid and any way you can show gratitude when they go out of their way, well, it's just the right thing to do.
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Many Assisted Living (AL) facilities have rules about gifts for aides to assure all residents of good care. You may speak to the director in general about any special occasions that allow remembrances. One I am familiar with did accept gifts to be selected at the December holiday party. The facility made sure there was something for every non supervisory worker. We were allowed to put our names on the gifts but whoever got them, got them. In another situation, the family took care of one special aide after our family member passed (no conflict of interest possibility). In a third instance, I made home made cookies for the aide with a card thanking her for all of the care she offered. With the envelope was a gift card. She said she wasn't allowed to take gifts as she might get in trouble. (She was from an outside organization so I wasn't causing conflict with on site do-workers). I indicated I wasn't mentioning the card to anyone and she was welcome to keep it (she did). The aides make $10-12/hour and most have families. They often work 2 jobs and we all know the work isn't easy. If we have the resources, it's just as easy to help someone you know as it is to give to a charity! More general ideas? Get the care giver talking about things they like to do and then share something you 'no longer need'. Books, magazines, knitting/crocheting wool you no longer need, some school supplies your grand kids never used, CDs/videos you are finished with, etc. Look around your home and declutter by passing on, it's amazing what we have too much of that others would be pleased to have. Sometimes it's more acceptable for them to take it if it's something you have an extra of and "hate to throw away'. And I'm sure I needn't mention, this should all be done in private. Gift cards easily slip into pockets! : - ) Remember, they should be to basic stores, not the luxury places.
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