I'm still struggling and I feel traumatized every time I think of the day 9 months ago when I had to place my mother at an assessment centre knowing she was going to be deprived of her liberty and that she would never be going home. After assessment I found her a lovely dementia facility where she is now settled but I can't forgive myself for placing her there. I live alone with only my wage. I wanted to live with her and have carers in while I worked, but nobody would fund the care for that. They would only go in 4 times a day which was no good as she was starting to wander. She was looking for her childhood home which she would never find. Now I wish I had given up everything to care for her. I know it would have been hard, and no matter what people say to convince me I did the right thing, I can't get over this. It's the worst thing I've ever had to do and I will never forget that day that I left her. It still breaks my heart and I don't know that I will ever be at peace. I feel like a horrible person and I'm being repaid for doing this to her. Don't know what to do any more. I'm so happy go lucky in front of everyone, but in private I'm so very sad.