My elderly Mom who is 86 has never been diagnosed with Alzheimers or Dementia but she has demonstrated many of the character behaviors and physical traits of the diseases. She becomes horribly angry when I try to talk to her about it. I suggest that she may indeed be able to get relief from her memory loss, anxiety, and depression if she accepts help from the medical community. She stays mad at me for days afterwards. I only want what's best for her and to try to lessen or slow progress of disease. I think she may be in mid to late stages of disease that may not allow her to "see the benefits". Any suggestions as to how to proceed?
Since your mom is so against medical intervention, you may have to wait for an incident to occur such as a fall or pneumonia etc that gets her an ambulance ride to the ER and an admission to the hospital. At that time, she will be tested for a slew of different things, whether she's 'agreeable' or not, and you can go from there. I can tell you that Wellbutrin has made a big difference in my 93 y/o mother's state of mind.........not miraculous, but she's not quite as stubborn and miserable as she was BEFORE the Wellbutrin was prescribed.
Since your mother is living in your home, her symptoms may become more than you can handle ie: incontinence, wandering in the middle of the night, staying up all night, etc. You may want to have a Plan B in force for if/when such a situation should come up. My mother segued from Assisted Living into their Memory Care annex this past May after her mental and physical condition deteriorated dramatically. They administer her meds & she is compliant, although questioning of everything....LOL.
Wishing you good luck & Godspeed dealing with this situation. I know firsthand just how difficult dementia truly IS, and how unmanageable a person can become when saddled with the miserable disease.