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Now they won't let me take her out to eat or anything I have been taking her was told I had to keep her in the county which I did so no explanation why for this letter of not taking her. She had a stroke but is ok 64 yrs old they had no place for her so stuck her in this nasty long term care nursing home! She has a small speech problem but does everything else I a so frustrated with DOA that i could scream as they treat me as a child also I am 65!
Also they take papers to her to sign and don't explain them and I told her not to sign anything as I think they want to lock her away...they are guardians and never even visit her and in the past have said mean things to her now she is so scared of all of them including mental health lawyer they are all in together. This is like a scary movie! She wants her own apartment and go back to work and I believe she can do both. We don't have the funds to fight them with a lawyer and I am so scared this stress will make her stroke again. She had her teeth all out finally after many months with infections and now they tell her she has no medicaid to get her new teeth she cant chew it hurts and the nursing home brings her hard food knowing she cant eat it an apple hard chicken patti? If the residents don't eat they give them Ice cream. So many are bone thin even my sister lost 30 lbs. Sorry just upset and have court tomorrow and hope the judge will let me talk!

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And a clean criminal history is necessary for guardianship as well.
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Des - the judge in order to change from one legally appointed guardian to another needs justification to do this. The fact that you even have a docket time in the judges courtroom is a sign that this judge is willing to hear your position.

This is a good sign.

The court will need to clearly be shown that the petitioning person (you) is responsible (like qualified) to be appointed guardian. You need to have a stable living situation, a source of guaranteed income, a clean credit report; have it so that you or anyone in your home or dependency do not have any felonies or other legal issues. Just being family is not enough.

If the DPOA (a niece) willingly turned over her DPOA to let state appointed guardian take over, that is a big plus for the states position that court appointed guardian is the route to go. As there was no other suitable family for the niece to consider.

It sounds like sister has significant mental health issues. 6 mos in unit is a really really long time in this day & age! A court appointed guardian can get a lot more done & in short order for her than a regular guardian can. if you appear in court to be distraught, upset or start criticizing the guardian, you are toast on ever getting guardianship. criticizing the guardian is basically telling the judge he was wrong in his appointment of the guardian. Not a good position to be in......guardianship really need an attorney to do it for them as it gets the emotion & family dramarama out of the courtroom. You need to be calm & collected and with any documentation to show your own stability to ever have the judge reconsider changing guardian. Good luck.
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Desmee, please re-read Country mouse's advice. Deep breathes. Think of this as a long term project.

You are going to need to look at this story from more than your sister's point of view. When you say that your niece had POA, so it got walked all over, that statement does not sound like it comes from the point of view from someone who understands all sides of the story, or from someone who understands that you may need to explain the story to a new listener.

It sounds as though your sister had some extreme mental health/behavioral needs after her stroke. Has she been diagnosed with Vascular dementia? Are you aware of all her current diagnoses and medications? If your other sister was not successful at housing her, what differences in her current circumstances make you both think that her stay with you will have a different outcome?
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Desmee if you have court tomorrow what you need to focus on today is NOT MAKING ANY MISTAKES. So have patience, step back, take a deep breath. The crucial point to get across to the judge at this point is that you are not the sort of person who rushes headlong into a situation without thinking it through very carefully.

This is a very difficult position for you to be in. You need a lot more information from your sister's doctors and healthcare team, and of course, unfortunately, you can't get it because you never had POA or guardianship. A Fix with a capital F.

What I'd recommend is that you look on this as a long work in progress, with the ideal end point being guardianship. So when the dept of aging says you need to show responsibility, don't look on that as an insulting criticism - it's actually sound advice.

Given the history you describe, just picking your sister up and taking her home would be nuts. You'd be in the same position as your other sister within a very short space of time, and that would be your ill sister's last chance gone up in smoke.

What you need to do is find out a lot more about her care needs and her medical history. So if you tell the judge that you need to be given all this information so that you can work with her healthcare team on a sound long term care plan, that's what the judge will want to hear. Plus that is actually what you need to do. There is clearly a lot going on that isn't being discussed properly with you because of confidentiality issues. But what ISN'T going to work, not for anybody, is just saying that your sister is fine and there's nothing stopping her coming home except greed on the part of the nursing home - the pitiful funding they get wouldn't tempt anybody that way, for one thing; and for another it makes it sound as if you're in denial about how much assistance your sister really needs to live safely.

So tomorrow, go along, listen carefully to what everybody says, and show that what you want is to STAY INVOLVED in supporting your sister's wellbeing. You're going to have to work with them and be patient, and just be prepared to take things one small step at a time. But take heart, because nothing is forever and as long as you're still on the scene there will be things you can do to help her. Better than getting dismissed, and making the judge think you're a clueless amateur who isn't a good candidate to take care of your sister. Best of luck, please let us know how you get on.
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6 months in a BSU behavorial science unit sounds extremely serious to me. What was her diagnosis?

To get guardianship, your sister must be proven to be incompetent by I believe 2 doctors and you must be able to show yourself to be a responsible person. The cost is several thousands.

Why are you going to court in the morning?

Why do you anticipate the judge not letting you talk?

I agree with GardenArtist. There is more to this story that we have yet to hear. Please fill in with more details?
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My niece had POA so it was all walked over.... my sister was sent to a brain center after being in hospital because she got mad guess they thought she is nuts...then came out and stayed with me then younger sister and she fought with her and upset her and her Dr because she was mad put her in BSU behavorial science unit for 6 months they had no where to put her and she refuse to live with anyone asked for her own apartment and she can do everything now Dr's in nursing home says she is fine..has a very small spot on the brain but knows how to live just has a few words at times that are not right. I believe this is a money game to keep her as they get state funded. Her rights are being violated and I will contact the state again. Upset isnt the word for it as she trusts me to help her and she has no one else..her kids don't want to be involved as it involves courts and such. So I just need to know how to get guardianship without a big mess to go through...I don't like to fight at all! Thank you
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Did sis have powers of attorney in place before the stroke? If not, then social services is required by law to pursue guardianship.km,
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Desmee, you sound very upset and overwrought. While I understand why, you can't help your sister if you are flustered and upset. Take a deep breath.

Your sister had a stroke and is having difficulties with speech. Have you spoken to her doctors about what the damage to her brain is like? What did the doctor's recommend in terms of rehab and a long term care plan?

Where is your sister residing now? Is she receiving therapy? Have you spoken to the nutritionist and the speech therapist about her diet?

Why is there a mental health lawyer involved? Did your sister have mental health issues before the stroke?

Who was appointed guardian? Do you have access to this person? It would be better to try to work with that person to get your sister better care.
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Desmee,
"I have to show responsibility to get it?" What does that mean? What have they seen in your behaviors that leads to a statement like that? Have they seen alot of anger in you? First, you need to realize that they are trying to help your sister as best they can. What was her living conditions before the stroke? Were you living together? Were you both working? How long have they had guardianship? Were you available when the guardianship hearing was held that appointed them guardian?

Laws vary between states and your sister needs a lawyer, you possibly another lawyer. At the hearing tomorrow will you sister be present? As long as she is found competent she will be allowed to make her own decisions and the court should find such.

Have you thought about getting a second opinion from a neurologist? You can ask the court to postpone the hearing in order to get another doctor's opinion. That would be covered by sis's insurance and a reasonable reason to postpone. Why has she lost Medicaid coverage?
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How and why was guardianship instituted in the first place? Where was your sister living then? Were you caring for her? What were her medical problems?

Guardianship wouldn't have been instituted if there weren't a legitimate reason.

What is the purpose of the court hearing tomorrow?

I think there's more to this situation and it would help to know what those details are.
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