How do I get grandma in law to move out? My boyfriend wants her out. I’m pregnant and she’s becoming too stressful .... having to be watched, doing things for attention. Sometimes she’s loopy and I have to carry deadweight since she can’t think for herself. Nobody wants her including children because she used to be a addict and she’s currently still on methadone so on her good days .... she can’t clean up after herself, she has flies all over the house ... she gets bloody noses & doesn’t be careful with her blood, which she has hepatitis c & I really don’t want my newborn baby around that. We don’t want her here anymore as she likes to argue and not listen ...... we can’t leave her alone & she’s interfering with my mental health since I can’t get anything done, pregnant and with her. She isn’t respectful, she’s rude, lazy and gross sorry.
1stly, who's house is it? This makes a big difference.
2ndly, do you & your boyfriend agree on this? That will really help!
3rdly, introduce some boundaries immediately. What you will & won't do.
For me that would look something like; if cooking dinner, I would cook enough for everyone in the house. If doing dishes, I'd do all the dishes returned to the kitchen. But I would NOT be providing snacks on demand nor cleaning up after others. I would NOT be providing any personal care, eg bathing/dressing assistance. If this is required, Grandma must hire an Aide (her funds). I would NOT be assisting her out of bed/chairs etc. If she cannot move, she stays right there. If she falls, I would NOT be attempting to lift her up. If she could not get up alone or with minimum assistance, I would call emergency sevices.
What are your thoughts to those suggestions?
How long has she been living with you? Does your BF think it is YOUR responsibility to figure out how to get her out? Why are YOU the one helping her to shower?
As other posters have said, this is unsafe for you and your baby. It sounds like your BF has quite the messed-up family. I'm guessing that when push becomes shove, he will NOT be the one to kick his granny out. Whose name is on the lease or deed to the place where you are living? If you are not both on the lease or deed, then it's the other one of the couple who will have to move.
If grandma was in the house first, then you need to go. You should have never put yourself in that mess.
If you were in the house first, grandma needs to go. She does not need to be around you and your unborn child.
If boyfriend doesn't straighten this mess up then he needs to go.
It does matter who was in the home first. It is called RESPECT. Respect for yourself, respect for your unborn child and respect for grandma. (it does not matter the type of person she is or what kind of sickness she has)
You do not put yourself in this environment and you don't push grandma out so you can get in.
Regardless, "Grandma matters as well."
Sounds like boyfriend was ok with her being there, at first?