My mom is in a small ALF. She’s end stage Alzheimer's and has hospice. Hospice sends a bath aide 7 days a week. My mom is bedridden so she bathes her and changes the sheets everyday. I appreciate that she is being kept clean but one thing really bothers me. I’m allowed to have a camera in her room so I observe how she is being bathed. The aide will come in very early in the morning, wake her up then start to take off her gown. My mom is still sleepy from her medications and fights to keep her clothes on. Then after she removes her clothes she starts washing her whole body and doesn’t cover her up or dry her right away. Leaves her naked and wet as she turns her from side to side to change the sheets. Her bed is under an ac vent and she’s cold!! So many times I’ve asked them to please keep her covered at all times. My poor mom looks so uncomfortable and struggling to keep herself covered with her arms. Every bath aide she’s had does the same thing. I’m so fed up. Don’t they get training? How should I handle this?
We all understand the realities of having to adjust to communal living but when it has progressed to a point where the PEOPLE living there are dehumanized to this extent there are obviously problems with the workplace culture that can only be rooted out by appealing to higher authorities and holding management accountable.
You said a mouthful with just one sentence.
I just read your response to another poster about your mom throwing punches.
My godmother had ALZ and macular degeneration that caused her to go blind.
My godmother always spoke her mind in her lifetime.
I loved her. Some felt that she spoke too candidly. I didn’t.
She was an honest woman. If a person didn’t want a ‘frank’ answer, they would not want to speak to her, know what I mean?
Well, when her disease progressed and she went blind her son had to place her in the nursing home.
I would go see daddy when he was in the hospital, then drop by to see my godmother which was only five minutes away.
It was horrifying to see the amount of bruises that my godmother had on her arms! It was an excessive amount of bruises.
So, I went to the nurses station and asked why did she have so many bruises on her arms.
They looked at me and said that she was feisty and she fought with them everyday! It was so sad. She was terrified of them, I suppose her being blind made it a million times worse.
She no longer recognized my voice. She would either ignore me or shout at me.
One son lived on the west coast, the other lived close by but my godmother didn’t get along with his wife, so she had been estranged from that son.
Life gets complicated at times.
I hate to say it, but I was relieved when my godmother died. It was unbearable to witness how she suffered in the end.
Best wishes to you. I’m so sorry that you are in this situation.
I know that you will continue to be her advocate.
Take care.
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