Over and over again we wind up repeating the same arguments, the most recent being me urging her to pay bills online or by phone instead of writing checks, which don’t always arrive at the payment destination on time (she also complains about writing checks because she’s losing her vision). Whenever she complains (which is often) about anything and I offer ways to help, it is then met by more complaints and reasons why my suggestions could not possibly work for her, so she is “forced” to remain doing things the same way because it’s a conspiracy and the world is out to get her, etc.
In addition to the constant arguments that go in circles, my issue is if you don’t want help, why do you continue to bring it up to me? It seems she gets more satisfaction by ranting, raving, and implying her life is so extra hard, blah blah blah, but never through any fault of her own. It’s like talking to a cardboard box. Mom complains & complains, I offer 10 different avenues of resolution, Mom continues on & on complaining how my resolution won’t work for her because the world is all wrong, and I end up wanting to bang my head against a wall. God forbid she should ever take any accountability! She has become so contrary that it makes conversation extremely difficult at times. If she really doesn’t want any help, then she should be able to accept the way things are & make peace with it (which I have also suggested about 500 times).
There are days if I don’t leave the room and get a breath of air, I may blow my top over next to nothing. What can I do short of telling her to put a cork in it??! I apologize for the length of this comment!