Question about strength and courage and bounderies
My husband and I live with my father. We have our own apartment a few blocks away. The thing is my dad doesn't want us to waist money on rent, but save money to buy a home. And stay with him for now. Where we live, the houses are over a million dollars. We can't afford it. Dad bought his home a long time ago.
Rent is also expensive, but do-able for us. We use to go back and forth from my father's home to our place a few blocks away. My father kept criticizing about the rent. He's concerned about our finances. My husband receives a small retirement, and I'm not working, but have some savings in the bank, thank G-d. We decided to stay at my dad's so we don't upset him. We really want to go to back to our place though.
Dad relies on me to take him places since he doesn't drive anymore. I also help him get dressed before we go somewhere. It's not like I'm visiting a couple days, hear a little criticism and go. I would hear it everyday. Plus, he wants to go somewhere every day, and sometimes at night if he doesn't go that day. He misses going places like he use to. Some times, when my husband and I go places without him, he's upset about not going somewhere.
I sometimes tell myself, we should just go back to our place at night and not care what he says. But then he mentioned how I'm the only one he can rely on because my siblings live somewhere else and don't take him anywhere. I don't blame them. They have their own challenges. So now besides worrying about upsetting him, I'm more worried about breaking his heart and leaving, even though it's only a few blocks.
How do we DH and I get up the strength and courage to be in our own place while my father criticizes about it. I was thinking maybe if I was working or we had a part time something, Dad wouldn't be so worried about us. But I know, he would still probably feel sad to be alone. DH and I just need to grow a back bone I guess.