i recently placed my mother in a nursing home a week before Christmas, because she fell and i rushed her to the er and thankfully no broken bones or concussions, she had been falling a lot recently and becoming really unstable.that's when i learned she could no longer walk or stand alone by herself. that's also when i made the decision to place her in a nursing home because i could no longer care for her in the ways that she needed. my little brother is the only one that disagrees with my decision. i am extending my care to the best of my knowledge where i have placed her. i have been her care giver for the last few years do to her alzteimers and her declining health, but she has lived with me for 23 yrs and been my best buddy and friend the whole time. everywhere i look i see things of hers, i cant go into her room i keep the door shut, i find myself crying a lot over everything even the little things, i know i have done what is best for her and me, as i am soon to be 59 yrs old and a 2 time cancer survivor as well as a heart failure survivor. its very hard to have watched her disintegrate before my very eyes, my family is very supportive, we keep occupying my time to keep me busy but i still find myself very depressed and crying, i miss her so much! i miss all of the silly things she did that made us laugh and joke, i never thought i could miss her grunts or her fussing. i now know i can go visit her and spend quality time with her that i couldn't before, but it hurts so much when she asks why she cant come home, she even found the phone in her new room and called home and asked why she couldn't come home and it hurt to know she is trying so hard but we cant bring her home. i need some input, help, or guidance on how to coup with this and how to move past the pain and depression.