How do I convince my Mom that she needs someone to stay with her at night when I go out of town?

Here is the choice.

A person is going to stay over for the two days you're away.

Or

She can go to respite care in a nursing home for those two days.

I'm pretty confident she'll choose the first option.

Tell her that you have invited [insert name] to stay for those two nights. Is this a person she's met?

You are doing what needs to be done to leave your mother safely.

You may not ever be able to “accept the fact”.

YOU need to accept the fact that you have made the necessary and compassionate choice, based on her safety, that she have someone stay with her.

As gladimhere has suggested, introduce the caregiver early.

You are not responsible for your mother’s “opinion” of this arrangement. You are responsible for her safety.

I would say to go ahead and schedule a caregiver to work for the days that you will be gone. I like what Glad has suggested. Do you feel that will help or that it won’t have an impact to meet the caregiver beforehand? Either way, she can’t be left alone, so arrangements must be made.

Do you fear that she will send her home? I know someone that tried to send a caregiver home on a daily basis. The family instructed the caregiver to ignore it. They managed. Knowledgeable caregivers know how to deal with this situation. They do it all of the time.

Best wishes to you. Go on your trip. Your mom will manage in someone else’s care. You realize that she can’t be alone and are a wonderful daughter by scheduling additional help. If this goes well, you may want to schedule the caregiver on a weekly basis, so you can take some time away, to get rest and time for yourself.

You find the agency you want to use, and the person. You start having that person come for a visit a couple times a week so mom can get to know her. That may make it easier for mom when the time comes. Make it a friendly transaction, not solely a business one.