Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
He can't control his agitation and anger, so why put him in situations where it can occur? Who wants to feel that way? It's upsetting for him. It's not fair to him. This is why he needs meds -- even if you never take him out -- it will help him and you.
If he cannot control himself in public then he no longer goes out in public. I stopped taking my father to lunch because he would loudly discuss his bowel movements. No one needs to hear that. His desire to overshare does not trump others desire for a peaceful meal.
Two things come to mind considering you checked dementia for your question. If your husband isn’t on medication to calm his extreme behaviors, he needs to be, it’s a kindness to you both for him not to be so out of control. Secondly, it may be time he can no longer handle public outings, it may be too much for him now. I’m sorry it’s gotten to this point
Either keep him home with a sitter, talk to his doctor about medications for his agitation or you can hand the folks he's hollering at pre-printed cards explaining that your husband has dementia so they can better understand his outbursts. You can probably order those cards from the Alzheimer's Associations website. But in all reality, it's probably best that you just keep your husband home and away from things that irritate him.
If he is behaving in this manner, it is only a matter of time before he will turn this unreasonable anger on you, if he hasn't already.
Talk to his doctor about meds to calm him. It depends what is causing his outbursts or his delusions. He may be helped with anti-psychotics, or with sedatives, or with anti-anxiety meds. You may have to experiment before finding what works.
I see several responses here about handing out cards explaining dementia to people observing the incidents. These might be appropriate in situations that are just a little embarrassing/uncomfortable for people--I suppose those might include staring, mildly inappropriate comments, etc. Education is good. But when someone is becoming agitated and raising their voice in a threatening way, things are way beyond this as a solution. From the viewpoint of the stranger who is confronted, they have no way of knowing whether or not this person will become physically violent, and indeed, many dementia sufferers are still very physically strong and actually do become violent. This is very unfair to both the unsuspecting stranger and the person with dementia. They are yelling because they are upset and anxious. Certainly look into medication to help them stay calm, but if that isn't working it's time for them to remain in their familiar environment at all times.
I agree with suggestions of calming meds and also leaving him home, but another thing I read once for inappropriate behavior in public is you can print out small cards that read something like “please excuse my husband’s inappropriate behavior. He has dementia. Thanks for understanding”
Stop taking your husband with dementia out in the public. There may come a time when he will throw something, like hot coffee, at someone with his anger and cause injury you will be responsible for.
Medication may help, but it’s better to place your husband into memory care.
Don't take him out. You can hand out cards, but people may feel their time is being infringed upon and should not have to be confronted by an angry person dementia or not.
We had an elderly hospital volunteer who threw a cup of water on a person he imagined he had a disagreement with. The volunteer office ended his service for that day and sent him home. I don't think he was allowed to come back after that incident.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You can probably order those cards from the Alzheimer's Associations website.
But in all reality, it's probably best that you just keep your husband home and away from things that irritate him.
If he is behaving in this manner, it is only a matter of time before he will turn this unreasonable anger on you, if he hasn't already.
Talk to his doctor about meds to calm him. It depends what is causing his outbursts or his delusions.
He may be helped with anti-psychotics, or with sedatives, or with anti-anxiety meds. You may have to experiment before finding what works.
Medication may help, but it’s better to place your husband into memory care.
We had an elderly hospital volunteer who threw a cup of water on a person he imagined he had a disagreement with. The volunteer office ended his service for that day and sent him home. I don't think he was allowed to come back after that incident.
See All Answers