How did you handle expectations during the nursing home lockdown without seeing your loved one?

Southern, I'm so sorry that you believe all NHs are "notoriously lacking in actually caring adequately for vulnerable elderly". My MIL has been in 2 different LTC facilities and received excellent care in both. Neither was an expensive place, but both were faith-based non-profits. She recently recovered from covid-19 at age 85. The facility had many staff out sick who could not return until a 2-week quarantine so they were chronically short-staffed. At one point they had a single nurse for 16 elderly covid patients. I cannot even imagine what that would have been like. They tried to do FaceTime meetings with my MIL but they were so short staffed they had all they could do to just take care of the sickest people. WIndow visits work if your LO is not sick. We haven't been able to physically be with MIL since mid-March. I recommend you have realistic expectations as the facility weathers this internal storm that has no known end in sight. Be patient and kind to the staff. We were able to donate face shields which they greatly appreciated. I wish your LO all the best and as much TLC as possible.