My uncle, my aunt's husband died some 50 yrs ago. My aunt continued to work up to he upper 60's. She has lived in the house she was born up to this present day. She has stated "she was born in current home and that is where she shall pass."
My mom was 89 when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and she wanted to stay in the home I grew up in when we moved here in 1968.
I had to move her first in an ALF for five years and then after she ended up with severe dehydration and COVID in April, nearly dying from lack of good facility care, I had to move her to a new one in May into their memory care wing. Why? Three reasons: 1) I couldn't go back and forth from my house to hers anymore 2) She wouldn't cooperate with any home health aides I tried to hire and 3) She had no substantial income to support in home care for a lengthy time - I had to sell the house and that's what I use to pay her rent at the LTC facility.
So the question is whether she has enough money to sustain living in her home as that will basically decide for her like with my mom.
My dad doesn't want to move either. Even though the money from selling would be plenty, the idea of paying so much discourages him. Plus, he's comfortable home. Yet, lonely.
Don't move her, unless you can move her close to you.. Just talked with a friend. He moved his mom into AL, she is 94. He thought it would be the end of her... suffice it to say, even with COVID,,, she is surviving there. She likes the activities, and the social part of it, well, now, since COVID, but she sounds like she is okay at least.. She actually is doing better here in the facility than in her home with a caretaker..
if house is paid for, and, can you move in with her? does she need help: ? maybe get her evaluated for palliative care/hospice.... they can come in and check on her. So her husband moved into home she was born into... over 68 years ago... so perhaps her home is debt free. thnk you may be able to work around that. let her be there. 98 years old... ask social worker etc. Another question... who does her taxes? anyone? who is taking care of bills etc... IF someone is doing these things.. taking care of bills, property taxes, etc. then get them on board and see what they suggest... My aunt didn't even know she was moved..if you make her room look familiar, maybe she will not even know...
friend said his parents had long life insurance (?) forget the actual name of it... my parents didn't have it.. so.... I forget... anyway, it is paying partial of what she needs to pay out.... I suppose it is working for them... Mom is a 20 mile drive from his home. I had suggested he move her closer, but at 94, I think the less moves, the better for the geriatric at this point... then again, one of my best friends, has an aunt on one side the states, and has nobody.... friend is trying to figure out how to get her moved into a facility within a 20 minute drive vs a 2 hours flight, or however it takes to fly from west to east coast. It has been a very long time since I stepped into an airport, let alone an airplane.
My mom was 89 when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and she wanted to stay in the home I grew up in when we moved here in 1968.
I had to move her first in an ALF for five years and then after she ended up with severe dehydration and COVID in April, nearly dying from lack of good facility care, I had to move her to a new one in May into their memory care wing. Why? Three reasons: 1) I couldn't go back and forth from my house to hers anymore 2) She wouldn't cooperate with any home health aides I tried to hire and 3) She had no substantial income to support in home care for a lengthy time - I had to sell the house and that's what I use to pay her rent at the LTC facility.
So the question is whether she has enough money to sustain living in her home as that will basically decide for her like with my mom.
Just talked with a friend. He moved his mom into AL, she is 94. He thought it would be the end of her... suffice it to say, even with COVID,,, she is surviving there. She likes the activities, and the social part of it, well, now, since COVID, but she sounds like she is okay at least.. She actually is doing better here in the facility than in her home with a caretaker..
So her husband moved into home she was born into... over 68 years ago... so perhaps her home is debt free.
thnk you may be able to work around that. let her be there. 98 years old... ask social worker etc.
Another question... who does her taxes? anyone? who is taking care of bills etc... IF someone is doing these things.. taking care of bills, property taxes, etc. then get them on board and see what they suggest...
My aunt didn't even know she was moved..if you make her room look familiar, maybe she will not even know...
my parents didn't have it.. so.... I forget... anyway, it is paying partial of what she needs to pay out.... I suppose it is working for them... Mom is a 20 mile drive from his home. I had suggested he move her closer, but at 94, I think the less moves, the better for the geriatric at this point...
then again, one of my best friends, has an aunt on one side the states, and has nobody.... friend is trying to figure out how to get her moved into a facility within a 20 minute drive vs a 2 hours flight, or however it takes to fly from west to east coast. It has been a very long time since I stepped into an airport, let alone an airplane.