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My 91yo Dad (diagosed with depression and Parkinson's--although that's going OK) lives with my 87yo stepmom (diagnosed with cancer--currently being managed ok). Dad's depression stems primarily from reliving the past (especially a particular bad--but very short and later annulled--first marriage), and some concern about the future. The good news is that he knows he shouldn't be depressed, he can some times talk himself out of it, and he even (he says) does meditation in the morning. That said, he's not taking his meds regularly, and sometimes will lie in bed all day. Stepmom called yesterday, concerned that he was still there at 5.30. The woman who comes in to help (who's pretty darned amazing) says, "Let him be--he's over 90." I talked to him and (I think) managed to get him out of bed. I suggested to Stepmom she needs to find other caregivers in similar situations, given my complete lack of psychological training. Is this whole in-bed-all-day thing a big deal (assuming it's just one day and not, say eight)? Thanks in advance.

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He is sleeping/lying in bed. He admits he's depressed and revisiting his "mistakes" of the past, and sometimes he's scared about the future. No pain I am aware of.
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What does your dad say regarding this situation when you talk to him? I know this sounds like a dumb questtion but what is he doing? For instance, reading, watching TV or just sleeping the whole time! Is your dad in a lot of pain? Is he taking any medication that could be zapping his energy level? I know there are times that the thought of spending the day in bed sounds really good to me and I probably would, if I could! That said anything you read/hear about depression, excess sleeping is always listed as a primary symtom.
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Make Valentine's Day a very special day for them. It will give them something to look forward to. A card, flowers, chocolate and maybe a little champagne.
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