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My mother never cared much about me, she adored my sister. My sister can not take care of herself as she is a raving irresponcible addict. I take care of my mother but she really hates me.
She has dementia and gives away all my things to other people when she has a chance. I can not always get those back. I have my things in a suitcase with a lock on it.
She drives her car and does not want me to drive but the insurance allows me to drive it. She has accidents at least 4 times a year. I can not believe the insurer they are so so patient with her. At the moment the car is yet again in the garage for repairs. I can not do the basics in the house.
She will ask me to paint her shed. she will say that is what I should do and when my sister visits she does not have to do these chores as she is different. (it has been like that since I was small) When I paint it and I take a break for a tea she will hide the paint. Those things drive me nuts. She is a drama queen as well.

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green623, sounds like it is time for Mom to move to assistant living, or to hire a Caregiver to come in to help on a regular basis. Your Mom might have to sell the house [hopefully it hasn't been re-financed to a point of very little equity] and move into something smaller if she has used up all her savings. As most of us know, houses need constant maintenance.

Hope you called the plumber for the water heater... depending on its age [like over 12 years old], sounds like it is time to replace. A 4-bedroom home only needs a 50 gallon water heater unless you all wash a lot of dishes, do a lot of laundry, take a lot of showers/baths, and the house is heated with central hot water heating coils.
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You both may well lose your lives if you continue living like this!
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OMG that water heater is ready to blow. Call the plumber ASAP.
Mom has dementia and is no longer safe to live alone. Don't ignore this, we recently had an elderly couple start a house fire and they did not know enough to exit the building!!!
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You leave the house. Call Adult Protective Services after you've done so. They'll take over and get your mom into custodial care if they deem her unsafe to live alone.
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She does not want to leave the house.
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The problem is she has been living alone for the past 10 years in this big house with 4 bedrooms empty and she thinks she is still 100% ok and can handle everything. In those past 10 years she managed to spend all her savings and she had a lot taken and/or stolen from her. She can not manage any more in any way. She needs someone to talk to but she can not listen. She does not use her hearing apparatus. She needs someone to keep the house clean and to guard her house. She took the alarm out as it annoyed her. The gas is still on after she made food and left the kitchen. I am not allowed to make any food. On my first day I noticed the 100 gallon waterheater was boiling and the fumes were coming out the top and it was whistling. She keeps the waterheater on full and she showers once a week. The fridge could not fully close and the ice was sticking out and she just mopped up the water all the time. The t.v. cable was taped and the t.v. was ticking and there was a line appearing in the middle every second. It nearly caught fire. If she lives alone in the house she will loose this house soon.
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Anywhere you live where you have to keep your things locked up to protect them is not a good place to live.

Regardless of your sister and what she's doing, take steps to get your mom full-time care whether it's in home or in a nursing home and make a life for yourself. You shouldn't have to live that way.
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Move out.
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I don't think you can and why would you want to live this way? Time to look at other options for Mom's care. Take your life back!
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