How can we find a memory care facility for someone who has had outbursts and hit people?

It is not easy, patients like your LO are simply not worth the liability. It is not like they will have a hard time feeling the bed.

Good luck even if you go through all tge steps you will be hard pressed and the places that will accept them may not be great or even close by.

Have to look at it this way, why take someone who has a history of causing problems? I

Daughterinlaw56, that’s a fantastic idea! I don’t know if her former memory care kept a list of triggers (she’s still in the hospital and the social worker is looking for a new place). We will make sure to bring that up with the hospital, as well as document it ourselves. Thank you!

Is the MC keeping behavioral data to show the antecedent(trigger)? We keep our own data on MIL, because once the trigger is identified then a plan of action can happen

Has she had a thorough neuropsychiatric evaluation by a professional trained in geriatrics? May provide unexpected info about triggers for her episodes, and lead to better planning for type and timing of medication.

Has she had a recent audiological eval done by an audiologist with a CCC credential in audiology AND geriatric training/experience?

Aging adults sometimes develop “recruitment”, an unexpected increase in volume of sounds. Unpleasant and uncomfortable. Can sometimes be modified by using sound reducing headphones or masking devices, or modifying noise levels and exposure to noisy environments.

With these 2 pieces of information in hand, you may find it easier to manage her behavior both for her own comfort, and also to support thefact that you as her “support system” are trying as they are to find a suitable place for her.

Worked well for us, hope you get some helpful information.

(I also suggest googling the term “recruitment”. There are several articles available for you to take a look at).

Every single time my mother with dementia gets combative is because her meds need adjusting.-probably because a little bit more of her brain has died.

I agree that being able to document your Mom’s treatment with a Geriatric Psychiatrist will go a long way.

Best of luck to you!

You cannot expect ANY Memory Care ALF to accept an aggressive resident who hits people. All residents have to feel safe and be afforded the opportunity to live in a safe & relatively peaceful environment in Memory Care; otherwise, all hell will break loose and angry daughters & sons will demand the administration kick out the angry and aggressive residents who are lashing out at their parents. Let's face it. My mother lives in MC and if a resident was hitting her, I'd raise the roof, so there you have it.

The answer is this: your loved one needs a geriatric psychiatrist who can monitor her care and prescribe her medications to keep her behavior under control. Once she's stabilized for a while, you can tell the new MC facility that she IS under a psychiatrist's care and that will go a long way to helping get her admitted.

You can also look into the smaller care homes/group homes like Gladimhere suggested. Speak to the social worker at the hospital about recommendations. Look into Skilled Nursing Facilities as well.

Best of luck with a tough situation.

Hopefully they get her meds under control and this behavior won't happen anymore. If it does, they might be able to readjust her meds again, in an attempt to keep her from hitting people. I think as long as you're open to more meds, that some facilities would be willing to work with you/her.

Ask the SW what other options there are and how others have navigated this issue. Your mom is certainly not unique.

My mom became very agitated and would strike out. She was kicked out of memory care. She was on hospice at the time and hospice recommended a much smaller care home, better caregiver ratio and was cheaper too. Everyone there had been kicked out of their previous facility. And the place was beautiful, well maintained and more home like.

You might call a hospice organisation in your area to ask for recommendations for agitated residents.