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When my father died my mom was anxious about living alone and that was understandable, I don't think she had ever lived completely on her own in her life. I did what I could to help her, I installed better locks, visited weekly and sis called almost every day but there was never any thought that she could not learn to adapt just as her other widowed friends had. I think you have to deal with this by setting reasonable limits to your time and going about your life as much as possible. Don't let mother push your guilt buttons.