Dad is 84. Dad is unable to dress or bathe himself; sometimes he makes it to the bathroom on time; falls a lot; his left leg is basically useless due to some stroke activity; is diabetic, down to 120 pounds. Meanwhile, mom is 83, has heart issues but tries to tend to his daily needs. Of course, she's worn out and frustrated. I live 90 miles away so feel that my help is useless though I listen to her as much as possible. Mom has told dad numerous times that they need to talk about a nursing home for him; he is adamantly against it. So mom tries to pick him up when he falls (or calls 9-1-1), dress him, clean him up after accidents. He has home health care folks coming out once or twice a week. We've talked about hiring someone to live in. Is there something we're not thinking of? Some way mom can get relief on a regular basis? She's scared to go to the grocery store for fear he'll fall while she's gone and lay there bleeding until she returns. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.
Thanks for the recommendation of college students. That's one to keep in mind.
Do you have a local college nearby? Sometimes you can obtain help by posting a position in their recruitment offices for a student who might be able to spend some time helping your mom. Churches also frequently have people assigned to help in the caregiving area.
Is it an option to move your parents closer to you so that you and your family can lend a hand or at least be more available when needed?