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I'm scared she broke her hip a few months back and DPOA for health and finances so I could cover health if needed was given to me - my brother who had documents previously filed false charges with APS that I was stealing money from her they investigated her accts and my husband and I were both investigated there was nothing stolen so there was nothing to find. These 2 never even showed up when she was in the hospital or rehab but 3 months later when they found she had given me the documents of DPOA. I am here for her 5 days a week, sat and sun have a company send in caregivers and she has a lifeline. I get her groceries, set up her meds for her, cook her meals make sure she eats, clean house, laundry, do her Phys therapy in home exercises, take her to senior center, and other places, change cat box etc.. basically everything. He has contacted APS 2x filing literally false claims aginst me. I got all certificates and passed all state exams for home care aide with hopes that would settle them nope, they feel I should be here for free APS said absolutely I can be paid. I receive min low caregiver wage. Last time here he pushed me into a door as he came in with both hands I was not harmed but it made a sound. Mom came out on her cain he made her go into her room and called my sister ordering her that she has to go into assisted living and conceeded she can have a caregiver just not me. She got very upset yelling she wanted me not anyone else. Mind you shes 95. Shes been well cared for, I have done nothing to deserve this but get those documents. Tonight he is outside the house has flown in from Alaska and I'm afraid to even go to sleep, esp. after reading mythreesons post. Hes a bully his wife works for Social Services in another state and there is a lot of money in the estate. I would love that she donated it to charity over this but that's not for me to decide. I forgot to mention my brother is a gambler. He and his wife argued with the social workers on a phone conference when mom was to be released from rehab that she should be kept in assisted care there when the state workers here found her competent to go home and shes had 3 competency tests with her doctor since and been declared competent to be in her home. I don't keep her from talking to either of them, and don't want him here but I don't see I can keep him from seeing his mother. Right now hes flown down from AK and is waiting in his car for morning. He has contacted my own children and their wife's trying to convince them that I am in the wrong for helping mom and she would be much better off in assisted care. She begged me to come here so she could go home. Everything I have done her has been to help her. I believe he will do anything to regain control I really need advice and help now with him outside the door. I don't want control but there is no one else in state that can be here for her and make sure she has the medical care if he puts her away and/or gets her declared incompetent he's indicated in the past he wanted to sell the house which is in an area that houses have gone up in value beyond belief. Help!!!

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If your mom can afford this, and she sounds like she can, you need to talk to a good elder affairs attorney - I found that just having someone like that in your corner who knows the law can give real peace of mind. And don't be afraid to file police reports when he hits your, threatens etc. Leave a paper trail.
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There are standing and springing POA's. Standing is valid at anytime. Spring only goes into effect after a doc or two has found them incompetent and not able to care for themselves. There are medical and financial POA's, sometimes combined as one.
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DPOA stands for Durable Power of Attorney meaning its until the person initiating it dies or revolks it. The other POA is for a one time thing. Like giving a person permission to step in for you for like selling a certain property. It's only good that one time. APS has found you not guilty more than once. I think they have his number. They have to investigate his allegations but not find for him. Your brother is probably worried that the POAs mean you have control over the money. Which u really don't. It's just a tool to help ur parents. Make sure you keep good records in case he questions anything.
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You are being threatened and stalked by him.

File police reports...NOW. Do not wait for morning.

Next....get an attorney and file against your brother and wife (both)
Charge them with stalking you and filing false reports.

You need to stop this now. This guy is unhinged ... you are not safe.
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Yes. Document, document, document. Being a gambler, he's never going to give up trying to declare your mom as incompetent. Do you only have DPOA? I think DPOA is only for medical, right? Do you also have POA on her financial side? I've read here on this website, when the 24/7 caregiver has only medical POA, and the greedy sibling (usually the golden child who can do no wrong) has the financial POA. The financial ones trump the medical one in doing whatever they think is best for the parent and the caregiver is left in the dark. If you don't have the financial POA, after brother goes back home, talk seriously with mom about this. Since she's competent, explain as simple and direct what will happen if bro declares her incompetent and gains financial control over her. You know your mother best. If you think she will defend bro wholeheartedly and refuse to believe you, then approach the POA from a different angle.

I'd be panicking, too. Best to document as much as you can. For you and your family's protection.
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Call the police now. Documenting this unstable behavior will help you. Follow up with a restraining order against him for you and mom.
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If you feel threatened, call the police. Report that someone appears to be lying in wait for you outside your home and that you are afraid. Let them come and investigate.
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