He takes a few wipes and washes his rear and privates then proceeds to spray a half a can of deodorant on himself. I have tried numerous times to say his children and grandchildren would like him to bathe more often, and he insists on wearing the same clothes over and over. I do sneak his underwear in the wash or he would wear them for days. I threw his old sneakers in the trash the other day due to the odor!
Does he change into PJs nightly? If so, take away all his clothes nightly. Put them in the laundry and somewhere he can't retrieve them.
Spraying so much deodorant on himself seems like a very unhealthy practice to me. Have you asked him if there is something about showering that is difficult or unpleasant to him? Would he take a bath? Do you have a shower chair?
And hiring aides to come a couple times a week often works well too, as you're not being the "bad guy" who's making him shower.
Before my husband became bedridden and was very unsteady on his feet, I would get him in the shower on his shower chair, and then I would stand on the outside and wash him up real good. Yes I got a little wet, but honestly not too bad, so you might want to try that.
And as far as him wearing the same clothes, perhaps you can try buying several of the same outfits, so he thinks that he's wearing the same clothes when in fact you're putting the dirty ones in the laundry and putting out more of the same.
I did also use the extra large body wipes on my husband for the in-between showers, along with the waterless shampoo/conditioner caps that worked great to wash his hair. You can order both on Walmart.com or Amazon.
I wish you well in getting things figured out.