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My mother is temporarily living with my sister who has joint financial POA over my mom with myself. However my sister has spent a large amount of mom's money in one month period during Covid-19 because she said mom
is elderly and therefore the money should be spent. She orders things every day on line, has put in a new pergola, ordered new sewing machine
bought new furniture and gives her grandchildren from mom's social security check. She withdrew mom's stimulus check as soon as it was
deposited in the bank and also withdrew most of her social security
check, stating she was putting it in a box to save for mom but I know better.
She will not give me mom's debit card and is taking money every way possible for her own personal use. Said she will use mom's and save her own money because mom can't take it with her if she passes. Mom has
dementia Alzheimer disease. I am a healthcare worker and want mom to be safe while I continue working and have a great potential for covid exposure, however, I know mom will be better off with me because I have never financially or physically abused her. My sister curses her and ties her hands up. I don't know what to do.  Please advise me.

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You really can’t opine since sister is primary caregiver & probably takes a lot of physical & verbal abuse from mother. If you want to change lives with her, or give sister respite, try it for a week. See how you like it. Always love the siblings that criticize from afar. Giving abuse in return is unacceptable. Mother needs medication to calm her down. Why can’t you handle her $$$ if you also have poa? If you believe she’s not doing a good job w $$$ or caregiving, document it. You can’t believe anything from mother’s broken brain. Sister obviously is burnt out. Happens to all caregivers of dementia parent. It’s very stressful especially when seniors doing caregiving. Hugs 🤗
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Rent and care salary? Call a couple of different couple of different home care companies to ask what they charge for 24 hour care. You will probably find that it will be 10-12 thousand a month. Then add in the long term losses you will experience because of not paying in to social security. MetLife did a study on the cost of caring for someone and found that the loss over three years is about 300 thousand dollars.

Then figure the benefit to your siblings in terms of money not spent over those years and increase in value to their inheritance.

https://www.aarp.org/livable-communities/learn/health-wellness/info-12-2012/metlife-study-caregiving-costs-working.html see less
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Have you actually witnessed your sister tie her hands up? Or is that just what your mom says? Your mom has Alzheimer’s disease, so unless you have witnessed these allegations and your sister told you she took the money, how do you know it really happened?
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If you have joint POA for your mom, why doesn't the bank allow you access to her assets?

Being a POA means you and sister are fiduciaries for mom. Being a fiduciary requires a POA to use any assets for the principal's (your mom) best interest. I'm sure your mom cannot use a sewing machine or new furniture. Your sister is violating her responsibility and must be held accountable. Call Adult Protective Services and report her actions. Your sister may be required to pay back the money she spent from mom's account. Arrange for your mom to live elsewhere.
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I note that your mom, with dementia,  is living with your sister.  Is your sister getting paid rent and care salary?   Do you have plans for where you mom will go if you call APS?
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yankeetooter May 2020
What does rent and care salary entail? I live with and take care of my mom, but my siblings argue they don't have to help because I'm living there rent free? Is there other compensation I am entitled to?
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What?!? You don't know what to do?

As a health care worker you are a mandatory reporter. You need to call APS and the police to report this abuse.

You know that if someone else reports this that you can be more responsible then your sister because you know that she is abusing your mom and you have done nothing.

Your sister doesn't get a free pass to physically abuse a vulnerable senior, you need to call the authorities TODAY!
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Are you serious? Your sister literally ties your mother's hands? Your sister has taken your mother's money and spent it on garden furniture and pocket money for grandchildren?

As joint POA, you have joint responsibility with your sister for what happens to your mother's money. Plus, you are a healthcare worker: you presumably have had at least basic training in adult safeguarding. Why have you not already reported what you know to APS?
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As a health care worker you are a mandated reporter. Notify APS today. What could be the reason for binding her hands? Have you witnessed this? Or has someone told you about it?

Stimulus check? Is mom on Medicaid? That money has to be spent by the end of the year. But, should be for mom's needs.
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consult Adult Purotective Services for elder financial abuse and physical abuse. Get her removed as POA. POA is not over someone. POA is to to act in the best interests of the person; not imposing their will over someone.
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Call APS immediately. You are looking at a nightmare scenario if Mom ever needs to go into a nursing home and needs to apply for Medicaid. Medicaid will look at her financial statements, question where the money was spent and very possibly deny her coverage.
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Ties her hands up? You mean literally binds her hands? If so get evidence of it and call the police, APS, or both.
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