It depends if he’s able to walk & stand on his own. If you have roll in shower, possibly with shower chair. Which is similar to wheelchair with a seat like toilet seat. Otherwise, sponge bath is fine. Hugs 🤗
Hire a caregiver to help him shower, is my first idea. Lots of elders won't say "No" to a stranger, but love to say NO to a family member!
Normally, when an elder refuses to shower, they're either suffering from dementia/Alzheimers or they're afraid of some situation inside the shower, or both.
My mother (with dementia) was deathly afraid of falling in the shower, even though she had caregivers to help her, grab bars, a shower chair, and the shower looked like Fort Knox it was so secure. She felt it was 'slippery' in there. I finally had an idea to buy her a pair of water shoes like you'd wear at the beach when rocks are present in the ocean. That did the trick and she never had another issue taking a shower.
Find out what part of taking a shower your father doesn't like or is afraid of, and then fix it (if possible). Some don't like the force of the water spray, so get him a hand-held shower head that HE can regulate. Those are normally very helpful. If dementia is at play, many elders forget the steps involved TO taking a shower. Or they think they 'just' took a shower that morning so there's no need to take 'another.' One woman was frightened to death when she saw her reflection in the mirror after getting out of the shower, which was remedied with a simple towel over the mirror.
The key is finding out why dad doesn't want to shower, and going from there.
People can and do keep themselves clean with sponge baths but IMO the ability to totally rinse off everywhere is good for the body and soul.
Is there a walk in shower or does he need to step over into the tub - this is a huge barrier for a lot of older folks. Does he have a good, sturdy shower chair with a back? Handheld Shower? Grab bars? Anti slip bath mat? Is his bathroom warm enough, is it equipped with a heater?
Without a lot of supporting details, my first thought is that Dad is afraid of falling in the shower. My FIL (deceased many years ago) was reluctant to shower due to the fall risk (he'd had many falls in places much less risky than the shower). This is very real to a person with a falls history. As a result, he opted for baths... but, you guessed it, he eventually got stuck in the tub and could not get out under his own power. He called my DH to get him out and I think additional assist was needed on top of that. Bathing is a huge problem for elders. I'd focus on WHY he won't bathe. Fear is probably pretty high on the list.
Normally, when an elder refuses to shower, they're either suffering from dementia/Alzheimers or they're afraid of some situation inside the shower, or both.
My mother (with dementia) was deathly afraid of falling in the shower, even though she had caregivers to help her, grab bars, a shower chair, and the shower looked like Fort Knox it was so secure. She felt it was 'slippery' in there. I finally had an idea to buy her a pair of water shoes like you'd wear at the beach when rocks are present in the ocean. That did the trick and she never had another issue taking a shower.
Find out what part of taking a shower your father doesn't like or is afraid of, and then fix it (if possible). Some don't like the force of the water spray, so get him a hand-held shower head that HE can regulate. Those are normally very helpful. If dementia is at play, many elders forget the steps involved TO taking a shower. Or they think they 'just' took a shower that morning so there's no need to take 'another.' One woman was frightened to death when she saw her reflection in the mirror after getting out of the shower, which was remedied with a simple towel over the mirror.
The key is finding out why dad doesn't want to shower, and going from there.
Good luck!
Is there a walk in shower or does he need to step over into the tub - this is a huge barrier for a lot of older folks.
Does he have a good, sturdy shower chair with a back?
Handheld Shower?
Grab bars?
Anti slip bath mat? Is his bathroom warm enough, is it equipped with a heater?