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Mom also has a kidney problem which is stable .She sees the Doctor every month for checkups. I have someone come in every day from 8.30 to 2.pm to give her a bath, breakfast and lunch as she feels she cannot do it. after that she lies down until I get home at 7.00 pm to give her dinner. She would not get up and help her self.

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I agree that antidepressants can be tricky for elderly people and drug interactions can be a problem. That being said, a visit to a psychiatrist may not hurt.

Low B12 can be an issue with elders since it's hard to absorb even when the diet is good, so B12, too, should be checked.

Finding a balance for her is what you want since she may not be the type to enjoy a big social life. Yet, what she's doing isn't good, either.

There are some excellent suggestions and opinions on this thread so I'd read through them and then make an appointment with both her own doctor for a B12 check and other blood work plus a psychiatrist who works with elderly people so he or she knows that medications may or may not be the issues.

Another thing about medications - have a doctor review what she's now taking since some drugs can cause depression. It's a huge puzzle for many - this interplay between health issues and the good/bad of medications. Please keep us tuned in.
Carol
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Well hell bring her over to my mother's house where they can both switch laying on the sofa or sitting in rocker all day long. Oh I forgot also can have lots of conversation with the dog while thinking of ways to harrass me.
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Before you take her to the doctors, start giving her 2-3,000 IU of vitamin D and sublingual B-12. Sometimes this helps tremendously. Giving older people "antidepressants" cause more issues than what they already have. Be sure she's getting a good diet, with lots of fresh fruit and vegetables. Limit or cut out all sugar. Get her outside in the sunshine if possible and keep her physically and mentally active. Good luck!
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If she is mobile, one of the best things you can do is get her out of the home for a few hours a day or at least two or three days a week. If there is an adult day care in your area, get her involved in the activities there. Most day care centers have a varied schedule of daily activities. Even if your mother is not into some of the activities at least she will be around other people which is always a positive thing. The statistics are very revealing in that it is a proven fact that elders who are involved in activities outside the home are typically healthier, happier and generally live longer than those who stay confined to the home. If you have trouble convincing her she needs to be getting out of the home and involved in some other activities then a get a doctors appointment and have the Dr. tell her how important it is that she get involved in outside the home activities.
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If one has a clinical depression, discuss with her doctor she is seeing every month her emotional/mental state. Depression can lead to heart disease if left unchecked. Being depressed is (in most cases) a chemical imbalance in the brain which an antidepressant can help. There is an art to finding the right "key" med to unlock that depression, but with patience one can find the right medication. Thinking she is just going to get active all of a sudden is naïve. Get her to a psychiatrist because most primary care doctors do not have the expertise to deal with depression. It is no fun to have depression, and it is a serious medical condition which needs treatment. I hope you get her some.
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If you can get her to try a senior gathering place, that'd be ideal. Wherever they gather you know they're going to understand each other better than we do! Also, among doctors and ourselves, we rarely speak of nutrition. Disease and treatments take a lot out of our bodies. I have always had anxiety, and I started with a micronutrient shake, and it's all but eradicated. Shakes are so easy to get anyone to take, too. Check out something called raw meal on amazon. I'm not saying in place of any medicine she should be prescribed, but we ARE all chemical so why we overlook nutrition is beyond me. I got my mother to drink this stuff for a while, and she was sunny beyond belief... then she stopped using it, I think she likes being blue, she always has. They can get pretty defensive about their sadness, they own it.
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I agree with the suggestions so far with minor additions. Ask her kidney doctor who they work with for depression. They will have folks they trust to be sure that the depression meds don't adversly affect her kidney function. One of the doctors, needs to be "in charge" of her medication regiment or at least review it regularly. Sometimes even a low vitamin D level can cause this. Winter is notorious for increasing symptoms due to lack of sunshine to out body and psyche.
Second- I agree to get her out of the home. Sounds like you have a caregiver who you've hired to help her. If you live in a warm state, get your mom outside.
Even going to the mall for a walk is good therapy and its out of the house. Have your CG include activities and "exercise" as part of her daily routine. This does not mean barbells and weights, just staying active. Start w walking around house or marching in place. 5 mins is all you need to start. 5 minutes for 5 days is 25 mins. Then next week try 8-10. Obviously nothing strenuous or dangerous for her abilities. Mix up the activies so it's not boring. Do you have zoos, parks, malls, grocery stores the CG could take her. Find things your mom used to enjoy and perhaps some happiness will come from breaking up the routine.

Good luck and keep a positive smile on when you talk with her.
Sell this not as exercise, she does not need to know u are even doing this. Just trying to find stuff outside the home she might enjoy.
Written on my phone and I can't review it. Sorry for any typos or silly sentences.
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My mom's docs wouldn't prescribe anti depressants due to her being a fall risk. And I do think my mom enjoys, in a kind of perverse "martyr-like" way, the attention she receives when she complains. Hopefully you can get your mom out and about with others her own age. Good luck!
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I will tell you (from experience with my husband) that a person suffering from the illness called Depression will not and cannot "just snap out of it." Medications are needed.
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Can I just put in a plea for idleness? - "how wonderful it is to do nothing, and then rest afterwards…"

It isn't that I disagree with other posters - depression is worth treating and does need to be looked out for, but inertia on its own isn't definitively diagnostic. If your mother has kidney disease, that in itself causes significant fatigue. All I mean to say is, do make adequate allowance for her being plain tired, too.
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