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Husband had 6 brain hemorrhages and just had a blood clot in his brain. I take care of mom, in remission. I work. How do I deal with my husband? He gets frustrated and watches everything I do. He follows me around, even to the bathroom. I am a teacher. He goes to school with me in the mornings, hangs at my school. My administrator does not mind. He waits around for me all the time. He watches and stares at me. Also, I am taking care of my Mom. This is her second time in remission from Mantle Cell Lymphoma. Her heart is now only working 20%. My Dad just passed, of Cancer, in August. How can I do it all? I do have a successful brother, but his advice was, "It is what it is, so do what you gotta do." Hum....

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I will check out BIAA.org. THANK YOU!
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Yes, the simple answer is you can't do it all and you do have to take steps to reduce the stress on yourself before it is impossible to go on. Brother Is-What-It-Is sound like a real stinker, but could you trust him enough to drop someone off at his place to give yourself a little respite?? Another possibly realistic option that comes to mind is seeing if hubby can do any day or maybe even short term residential post-acute rehab. He's depending on you because he can't trust his own brain at this point and possibly has not learned any techniques to compensate that he can use to get through his days more independently. If you have not already been that route you could go get on BIAA.org and see if there are any possible resources for you.
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Thank you for you suggestions. I get so confused. You made it clear cut and to the point. That is what I needed. I will think this over. Thank you again.
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You can't do it all. Hubby might do well in Assisted Living if he can get around and feed himself. He will have lots of company there. Taking him to work is not a good option at all. Mom, on the other hand, may be close to Hospice Care, and you might talk that over with the MD.
You brother is not going to step in either way, but if you ask him about a nursing home, I think he will support your decision.
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