Firstly, can I change *how* to convince to *try* to convince.
To try, I would use simple language. Try Facts or Feelings, depending on her personality & past way of decisions. Eg Talk about the practical Fact of a smaller space being easy to clean. Or the Feeling of doing the right thing for your time in life, to 'not being a burden'. Pictures may help. That's our new home!
If is certainly nicer to have your spouse on board with big changes, but unfortunately not always possible if there is a dx of dementia/cognitive decline/lack of reasoning.
If so, it becomes more about your own adjustment to being the solo decision maker. Giving yourself permission to take over. I imagine this can be very hard if you have had a marriage of shared decision making.
Your wife has dementia. She can no longer be responsible for making major decisions. Is downsizing for you to more safely care for her? If so that should be how you make a decision. If there is the possibility that you will have to place her in Memory Care in the foreseeable future, the downsize is more for you to live safely as well. And again this is how you view your decision. Sure she will not be happy with moving. She may decline a bit. But she will adapt. A suggestion for you though. If you do tours with her pay attention to how easy it will be to care for her. Go for single level living. Preferably handicap access to the house and to bathrooms and an accessible shower. When you have made your choice place her in Respite for a week so you can pack and move and set up your new house. Then bring her home. If you do this also pick the respite place with the thought that this maybe where she is placed for Memory Care when the time comes.
As said, you can't. It will all be up to you. Start by going thru closets and getting rid of clothes and stuff that you and her no longer wear. Throw them in a trash bag. Then u can tell her that ur taking the trash out. Get rid of anything you don't think you will use. U can ask that a For Sale sign not be put in front of the house. If you have children, ask them to help.
Please don’t try to convince a wife with dementia about this or any other big decisions. She’s not capable of reasoning out decisions. Make the move soon. I wish you both peace
In your profile you say that your wife has Alzheimer's/dementia, so I hate to tell you there will be no convincing, as someone with any kind of mental decline no longer has the ability to rationalize or be logical. So this decision will all be on you. If you feel that it's in the best interest of you and your wife, then by all means go ahead and start the process to downsize. And just keep in mind that folks with any of the dementias, don't take to change very well, so I would say if this is something you really want to do, I would do it sooner than later, so your wife can adjust better before her dementia gets worse. I wish you the very best.
To try, I would use simple language. Try Facts or Feelings, depending on her personality & past way of decisions. Eg Talk about the practical Fact of a smaller space being easy to clean. Or the Feeling of doing the right thing for your time in life, to 'not being a burden'. Pictures may help. That's our new home!
If is certainly nicer to have your spouse on board with big changes, but unfortunately not always possible if there is a dx of dementia/cognitive decline/lack of reasoning.
If so, it becomes more about your own adjustment to being the solo decision maker. Giving yourself permission to take over. I imagine this can be very hard if you have had a marriage of shared decision making.
Start with your stuff.
Is downsizing for you to more safely care for her? If so that should be how you make a decision.
If there is the possibility that you will have to place her in Memory Care in the foreseeable future, the downsize is more for you to live safely as well. And again this is how you view your decision.
Sure she will not be happy with moving. She may decline a bit. But she will adapt.
A suggestion for you though. If you do tours with her pay attention to how easy it will be to care for her. Go for single level living. Preferably handicap access to the house and to bathrooms and an accessible shower.
When you have made your choice place her in Respite for a week so you can pack and move and set up your new house. Then bring her home.
If you do this also pick the respite place with the thought that this maybe where she is placed for Memory Care when the time comes.
So this decision will all be on you. If you feel that it's in the best interest of you and your wife, then by all means go ahead and start the process to downsize. And just keep in mind that folks with any of the dementias, don't take to change very well, so I would say if this is something you really want to do, I would do it sooner than later, so your wife can adjust better before her dementia gets worse.
I wish you the very best.