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My mom has been living with me for 6 years. I am in the process of putting her in an assisted living facility but not until June. I literally am going crazy trying to figure out how not to have a nervous breakdown! I can’t go in her room , I can’t clean her bathroom, not because I don’t want to, because she won’t let me and accuses me for stealing and want to take her stuff. It’s just easier for me to stay away. But! All her life she was like this. I never was allowed to go in her room, wear her clothes, clean, use the washing machine, use the stove ! It’s crazy I know! Help!!

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Is there anyone at all who can take your mother out for a while so you can clean? Deal with the fallout when she gets back, but remember, SHE lives in YOUR house not the other way around. She is no longer entitled to stamp her foot and have you do exactly as she says. If you need to scrub the bathroom, do it. Let her scream and yell and accuse. It’s YOUR bathroom, not her’s.
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It's really tough when you are trying to help, but, get met with resistance. It was easier for me to keep in mind that my LO had brain damage and that's the cause for it. It's good that you have made arrangements for alternate care for your mother. I'd try to focus on how that will be coming up before too long. You probably need a break. Maybe, get some respite time before June though.
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