My Grandma is 84. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1999. Went under surgery and treatment only the find that on 2001 it traveled and become bone cancer in her pelvis. Since then , she has had a pacemaker put in (2004), had a knee replacement, suffers on and off aging severe bouts of vertigo, which leads to falls. Most recently Nov 26th, she suffered a horrible fall resulting in 2 broken cervical spines in her neck, and multiple fractures through the back. She is in a C spine collar and back brace currently still. She was hospitalized for a few weeks, including 10 days of intensive rehab. Became well enough to be discharged to go home. She was to go home Monday December 26th. On Friday December 23rd, we received a call from the home that they found her unresponsive and slurring words and we're calling a ambulance (original thought was a stroke). Came to be that she had a UTI. For 3 days she was delusional. We watched and waited. Christmas day, we were told to consider hospice, which was a shock since we were told by drs that it was just a infection and she should.come around in a few days. We came to find out that her Advanced Directive had no antibiotics or IV fluids on it. We were already 2 days into treatment at that time, and decided to continue forward. She is slowly coming around, but we have .outlying put her back at square one as far as rehab goes and I feel horrible. We were aware she had a AD, but unaware of such detail to it. My uncle insist that she wasn't aware either, my aunt says yes she was. I live near my grandmother and am very close with her. I KNOW that she has been ready to "let go", and now I feel that we went against her wishes. She is still not well enough to have the discussion with, and I fear it's going to happen again, sooner rather then later. My uncle says if it does we will treat again, I say no let her go. The wOman has suffered enough through her life and I know she's ready. My question is mainly, in a case such as this:
1. Should the hospital have even treated her in the first place? Her AD was on file there and we also gave then another copy again that night
2. Is a UTI severe enough means for a AD to come into play?
My uncle says no...we're all "dying", it's a infection that can easily be treated. I say yes, if it requires her to be hospitalized for treatment and rehab her AD should come into comsideration. He is the POA, so ultimately I have no "say" although we are a close family and try to make decisions as one. If and when she gets well enough to discuss this matter with a clear head, I honestly have no doubt that she would have not wanted us to do anything. I fear that he will talk.her out of it. He lives a state away and is not here to be the one taking care of her and talking to her like I do. Anyone else ever faced a issue such as this?