Hospice called and said dad has short time to live. We are not close because he abused me as a child. Should I go 2,500 miles to be with him?

smonett--your questions are very thought-provoking. I think I need a day to seach my heart and come up with the right answer. My dad's final arrangements have all been made--cremation forms have been signed, niche in the columbarium purchased and paid for. His best friends are snowbirds and wouldn't be available for a service until spring, so there's no hurry to do a memorial service. I've already started writing an obituary. Thank you for allowing for my needs, since his are being met. I appreciate your response.

It seems that you have done a terrific job of providing you dad with care and supervision despite the distance. You are to be commended for your selflessness in view of the abuse you suffered as a child. Ask yourself the question: Do you want/need to see him one last time before he dies or could you use the time and money to wrap up his final arrangements from your location? Would you be going to see him out of love, guilt or some other emotion? Search your heart and do what is best for YOU now. You have done everything that is best for HIM already.
Hugs
Sherrie