Since I'm a newby here, I don't know if this has been covered already but I thought this might be a place that we can learn those little hints from each other and possibly make life a bit easier in the caretaking realm.
The most recent item that I have found helpful to have with me all the time is a doorstop. After one very frustrating visit to a dr when no one, either staff or patients and their companions, did not offer to open or hold open the doors I struggled with while trying to get my mom's wheelchair thru the door, I happened to think of the doorstop; now I don't make any trips with my mom without a one.
We use a transfer shower/tub bench and I find it cuts down on water getting onto the floor to use two shower curtains which I pull together thru the slit in the bench and fasten with a clothespin. I also put a towel on the side of the tub to absorb any water that leaks thru the bench along with the ones on the floor beside the tub.
Just my two cents :)
This thread was a great idea... thanks for starting it... love and hugs....
Are you on SSI? Do you have a case manager or a social worker? That would be the place to start. If you don't currently have such a person for your own health conditions, call Social Services in your parents' county. Do not assume that they can't afford professional help. One or both of them may qualify for various services that would provide some relief for you.
I've been thinking of you and I'm worried. You sound like a very caring person and it is extremely generous of you to want to provide what your parents need. Consider your own needs, too, and look into what kinds of professional services might be available. Come back and tell us how you are doing.
To hear that your husband is dead when you don't know it is painful. To be told that you are so out of touch with reality that your parents have been gone decades and you don't know it is scary. Personally I don't see the value in providing this distressing truth over and over. It seems kinder and more helpful to me to accept their reality.
Please understand that I am not saying you are wrong. Just giving a different perspective.
I play whatever part needed to fit in with wherever his mind goes. Lots of times we both end up laughing. It's so good to see him actually enjoy himself on occasion.
I know it's hard and heartbreaking most times, so I really cherish the good times we can have together.
Welcome to the Family girl!
You're planning ahead and managing your time nicely, which relieves some of the stress. Sometimes, no matter how well prepared you are, unexpected things happen. Don't bottle it up and simmer in the misery. Log onto AgingCare and scream with us. ... And no matter what, try to smile. Even if it hurts.
First, give care to your disabled loved one because you love them. If you do it for the money or other benefit, you will find yourself woefully underpaid. Do your best and forgive yourself for being imperfect, and forgive your loved one when they poop in your hand and say they're paying you by doing so. You are in a crazy situation lacking the tools and resources you need, and no one cares who can help you much. That, as they say in the caregiving business, is the job. You will find people like us at websites like this one who understand what you're going through, feel your pain, wish they could help and have problems that put yours to shame. Sadly, we cannot help you. Except to applaud the work you do and respect and support you for doing it. Give yourself the support and encouragement you need. Good Luck. God Bless You.
be creative, trust me it will save your sanity!
on another note, how rude of staff to see you struggle with a door and do nothing!! id file a complaint, not that it would help. but how rude! they are there to help people, but too lazy to help a lady with a door? unreal....people!! uggghhh
I keep a stack of essential papers in a plastic acordian folder with an elastic cord. It includes a list of loved one's meds and dosage, medical history summar, a checklist of baseline ADLs, copy of POA document, and healthcare directive. Because LO's disease is not widely known even in the medical community it also includes some basic information about the disease. I update it before each trip and take it along. The closed sturdy folder helps ensure the papers stay together. I also grab the folder to take along on medical emergency trips. When they start asking questons in the ER and I'm pretty frazzled I can just hand them the folder and what they need is there.
Welcome to AgingCare.com. We are glad you found our site and I hope you find what you are looking for here. Our caregiving community is awesome and they show a lot of support to each other. I am sure you will find the caregiving connections you are looking for.
I have attached to articles that have been written by our editors. These should help you as you begin or continue through your caregiving journey.
If You Knew Then What You Know Now: Hindsight for Caregivers
New Caregivers: What to Expect
Best of Luck,