The nsg home blocked me from visiting her. I only got to see her 1 day because I contacted the ombudsman. I have reason to believe that my mother was heavily sedated before our visit. She could not hold her head up. I think this is so she couldn't complain and tell me what was going on.
I asked the ombudsman if she was keeping records of our conversations and if she would report the fall. She left me a message stating she was keeping a record of conversations. She also said she does not report falls. Lastly, she told me she could not help me in the future because I am not the health care proxy.
I am attempting to report the fall to the department of public health. I cannot get through to anyone.
I believe part of the reason I was blocked from visiting Mom is because I made a request for dental care. After the 3rd ask and nine months later, it was finally done. I think the administrator was angry that they had to pay for something my mother needed. I also notice other neglectful situations--
There is a male patient who is allowed to go into my mother's room. He takes off his diaper and pees on the floor or in the bed. He is allowed to sleep in one of the beds. My mother gets extremely frightened. I told staff about this. They said "it's not her room, it's everyones' room."
She can barely walk because she is getting contractures in her knees and feet. A year ago she was walking normal.
My sister and I had a falling out about a year ago. I apologized. However, she wishes to hold on to the grudge. She makes all the decisions for Mom. She is the health care proxy. This sister as well as other family members believe everything the nursing home tells them. They do not address my mother's pleas. I can't sleep at night knowing my Mom's getting neglected and my family is ok with it. She truly is in prison. I want her to live out the last few months with me in peace.
I have nieces that may get involved but it seems no one wants to see reality.
Residents fall. As my daughter says, its a given. My daughter has turned her back for a second and in that second the resident stands up and falls. State laws keep NHs from using restraints. No railings on beds, no restraints on wheelchairs. Alarms maybe but no guarantee that an aide will get to the resident in time.
You were lucky that staff listened to you or gave you any information because your sister is Moms healthcare proxy. She is the only one that staff should be talking to about Moms care. Now by calling an Ombudsman on them, they definitely will not talk to you.
Are u sure the one day ban is not because of COVID. Maybe they talked to your sister and she said to limit your visits. The only thing you can do is get guardianship. It overrides any POAs or Healthcare proxies. Then you make decisions for Mom and can transfer her to another facility.
She did not make up the story about the man in her room. I saw it for myself. Denial is a long river.
If she seemed overmedicated it is possible that her doctor began or switched a medication. It is not uncommon for people to have differing physical reactions to the same medication. Your mom's MPoA should be dealing with this, not you, although you can inform that person.
The elderly can fall anywhere. They are unsteady on their feet, and if they have dementia or memory impairment, they can forget that they need to use a walker or wheelchair. This is how my aunt fell 2x in her own home, each time breaking a bone, even though there were people right in the home with her. Once she fell while walking right next to my cousin and did a face-plant.
When my MIL was first moved into a NH she told stories about the staff having cat fights in the hall at night and people howling and other much less believable things. It's part of dementia, or can be caused by an undiagnosed UTI or problems with medication.
The NH does not pay for the dental care -- Medicaid does, if that's what she's on. YOU cannot request ANY medical care for her since you admitted you are not the MPoA. By law the NH and doctors cannot take direction from you on your mother's behalf. You were probably blocked by the NH at the request of the PoA because you are overrunning legal boundaries and causing confusion and chaos, so please stop.