Memory clinic full assessment tomorrow! Anything I can do to help Mom prepare?

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It's taken a while, but tomorrow morning nine o'clock sharp she'll be doing the full memory assault course - psychiatrist, psychologist, OT and mental health nurses. Hoping to get her there on top form and relaxed about it, any ideas?

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Just posting on the general subject. Its good to have valid results. We had to do an entire second neuropsych and pay for it (by court order, with markedly different results) because Mom got so angry and anxious on the first and the examiner kept right on going anyway.
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The other answer is NO, don't prepare or practice, you want them to have a snapshot of how thinking skills really are on an average day at the time, rather than the best possible performance.

My mom still scored in the dementia range though she took pains to memorize the day and the date before one of her evals...fortunately, actually!
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This post is old, from December 2013
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One general comment is that persons experiencing anxiety or anger do poorly on assessments, because they can't think as clearly. And some of the questions they get asked are a bit silly or insulting or seem stupid or they freak out because they maybe feel they are getting things wrong. So, if your parent is appropriate, coaching them that the questions can seem silly or dumb sometimes and just to play along and not worry can be good preparation.
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Make sure you bring her a sweater and a snack. Most psychologists don't want you in the room due to patient distractbility and test security.
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"One lady was with her husband, and had already had to nurse both her mother and her MIL through AD"
Some people are so harshly punished by life! That's what I fear will happen to caretakers of our generation; today's elders seem to be living forever, but our generation (50-60) isn't as resistant, therefore if our parents (especially if they are abusive) last a long time (more than a few years), we are the next in line to be cared for, without having had the chance to enjoy our last years of independance/freedom! It SUCKS!
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Thank you for answering, just to feedback: I needn't have worried, the clinic had thought of everything! A lovely psychiatric nurse interviewed us together first; then my mother took a detailed cognitive assessment test on her own while I sat out in the waiting room; next we saw the psychiatrist together - that didn't work quite so well, because I was too busy acting as interpreter to ask my own questions, but I'll follow up with an email - and talked through the possible diagnoses (far too many to be useful) and treatment options (none, realistically); then back to the nurse for him to check mother's answers against my day to day experience of her. The waiting area was supervised by a volunteer, too, keeping a discreet eye on any patients who were on their own. I was impressed with the set-up.

So perhaps we didn't get very far; but at least they have a really clear picture of what my mother is like now for future comparison.

I realise I'm very lucky that mother - for the time being, anyway - is taking a lively interest in her mental health and doesn't seem to be afraid of listening to all the information she's offered. One or two other people in the waiting area were clearly upset: I wanted to "give them a hug" then and there! One lady was with her husband, and had already had to nurse both her mother and her MIL through AD. I don't think any number of hugs would make her feel better just now.

It was still reassuring to have a plan when we went, though; so thanks again for your help.
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Oh Peg. Dear God. That's awful.

This is just a thought, but what you need is a ghost writer. Maybe someone at your local college, library, even perhaps a high school counsellor or a counsellor from your local hospital, or a clergyman if you're part of any congregation. (I would say local paper, but you need to be careful that NOBODY tries to publish your mother's story until any legal proceedings are all completely tied up.)

Get all your documents together - I'm not sure how it works in America, but I do know that you have much greater freedom of information that we have in the UK - plus diaries, correspondence, anything like that. What you're aiming for is a bullet-point summary of exactly what has taken place, when. So what you want the person helping you to do is, to sit down with you, go through everything year by year, point by point, and get all of these terrible dealings into one factual summary.

Then you make a folder of the summary plus any back up documents that you have, such as medical records, correspondence from lawyers, court records and judgments, NH correspondence and/or records.

Next: how does the pro bono legal advice system work near you? Do you have anything like the Citizens' Advice Bureau? Steer clear of no win no fee type sharks, but there must be some not-for-profit organisation that would be able to help you?

You've been through a nightmare, and you need your story listened to. It's dreadful.

And the worst of it is, it's too late to do the one thing you really needed, which was to reach your poor mother.

I'm so sorry, I feel that you've been badly let down. I really hope you find someone near enough to be of practical help to you. Normally I'd happily offer to look over any letter you write yourself; the trouble is that because I'm not familiar with American terms I could easily get something important wrong - I wouldn't really know what I was doing, not well enough. But I really hope you can think of someone who can help. I'm sure people would be willing to once they realise what you've been through. Good luck, let me know how you get on? xxx
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My mom went through this long 3 hour neuro-psych exam last summer. I remained away from it and had her caregiver go with her to the eval. I didn't want her to blame me for instituting, but in retrospect, it would have been good had I at least given some history by phone, as Mom didn't fill out all the pre eval paperwork and did not give the psychologist any type of good history. She left out many things that would have, in my retired RN opinion, helped with the evaluation. She was found to be in early dementia....but now denies all of it and says that these people didn't know what they were doing and wasted her money!! The psychologist recommended a re-evaluation in six months, which will be in Feb, 14. I WILL get involved in giving my own feedback this time, IF they want more history to work with. So I agree with others, to allow them to deal with Mom and the eval, and stay removed....but DO ask if they want input from you and do have some pleasant time with her afterwards, because it IS a long an stressful evaluation time. My mom was 'bonkers' afterwards.....so worred about things she did wrong or didn't know the answer too, etc.
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the nursing home my mother was put into,medicaid only n/h. brought in to home middle of night. 5 sepsis bed sores and broken ribs. no pre assesment.mom had been sesquistered for 2# yrs. i finally found her in n/h. called ombudsman and told her mom had money...300,000. when i got to n/h 600 miles one way, i had burden of proof, brother sold her house, and all trust money. i went to court for guardianship cost me 12k, doc made mom incompedent cause he could not wake..her ip. she had revocable trust and said i did not sign this. so i told her to draw line till legal aid gets here. legal aid never showed up. it took 5 trips back and forth. 2nd month, n/h director told my attorney we can come and get her if she wants to go. husband took off work, drove 1200 round trip and he said he changed his mind.court for guardianship never even read my petition. her guardian it litiimi if she was destitute but he never saw signs of abuse, they should of looked at medical
records. judge was aware of dpoa abuse and let him brother keep mom in medicaid n/h till she died 8 months till she died. brother stopped her bc/bs long term care payment but dropped her for non payment because they thought she died. i could of paid back payments and have her reinstate her and she could go 5* n/h. judge thought better she stay with brother. judge never signed court orders for 2 months. giving brother more time to wheel and spend any money that might of been left. clerk and master told me she never got the will. now 2 yrs later, someone found will in courthouse.brother is investigated for welfare fraud. court orders were not enforced. mom died in feb of 2012. i cannot afford another attorney i have all burden of proof, i just need letters written. please give me suggestions. thanks, pegweg
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