Every senior I know (including my Mother) refused in-home help at first. I can understand it - your home is your private sanctuary. And also, seniors read about all the scary things that have happened when unscrupulous people have invaded someone else's home. So I get the fear factor. I think hospice is a good choice for your situation. But you need to be careful here too. Not all hospice organizations are alike. Find out what care they provide and how they treat end of life issues. If you would like other assistance, I would recommend a caregiver business that has a good reputation in the community. I was referred by one of the social workers at our hospital. The owner came out to meet Mom, assessed her needs, and hand-picked her caregiver. He also calls periodically to check up on his workers. She has received excellent service and looks forward to their visits now. They come in once every two weeks or so - it gives me a little break. good luck...there is a never a roadmap when taking care of an ailing senior.
When you find out the 'why' of why she won't let anyone in the house, you'll know more of the 'how' to get her to change her mind. The only thing I can think of is 'pride'. If that's the case, I'd tell her to set the pride thing aside cause you need help. And if the roles were reversed, she'd want help for you too.
Perhaps you could tell your Mom that you are not calling in help for her, but that you are calling in help for yourself. Tell her, "I understand that you feel that you do not need or want help but please respect the fact that I do need and want help. Hang in there.............
Get the help anyway. Just introduce (hospice) as an OLD friend of yours that is just there for a visit. After a few times, just have the 'friend' help you with chores. Then perhaps Mom will allow her to be there with you not around.
Experienced hospice workers know how to introduce themselves without being intrusive. Let Mom know that you are happy to help her, but you needed to see your friend also.
You probably could call your local office of the aging or social service department and ask about Hospice-where they are available they are great for the patient and family-try your county first.
I think hospice is a good choice for your situation. But you need to be careful here too. Not all hospice organizations are alike. Find out what care they provide and how they treat end of life issues.
If you would like other assistance, I would recommend a caregiver business that has a good reputation in the community. I was referred by one of the social workers at our hospital. The owner came out to meet Mom, assessed her needs, and hand-picked her caregiver. He also calls periodically to check up on his workers. She has received excellent service and looks forward to their visits now. They come in once every two weeks or so - it gives me a little break.
good luck...there is a never a roadmap when taking care of an ailing senior.
Hang in there.............
Experienced hospice workers know how to introduce themselves without being intrusive. Let Mom know that you are happy to help her, but you needed to see your friend also.
God Bless