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Mom & Dad had 2 Shih Tzu dogs when they were still living in their home. They were not taking care of them. The dogs peed and pooped in the house all the time and my parents would not clean it up. They were not walking them at all because the dogs would take off and run away. They were feeding them hot dogs and people food all the time and they would get diarrhea. The house smelled horrible. In addition, they were not taking care of themselves. Not taking medications, not showering, eating left out/spoiled food. My dad is a diabetic and decided one day that he didn't need to take his injectable insulin anymore. When we found out what was going on the nurse monitored his use and he STILL didn't take it. They weren't paying their bills. They were eating Dollar Store chips and candy all the time for meals. When their doctors and the county recommended assisted living they did not want to go because they didn't want to leave their dogs. They didn't think anything was wrong. So, we tried getting daily help at the house. We arranged for help to come in every day to assist with meds and housecleaning. We got meals on wheels set up. Dad got life alert. But they would leave the house whenever the assigned help was scheduled to arrive. They don't need help!! But yet they would tell the social worker exactly what she wanted to hear. The move to assisted living became necessary when my dad's driver's license was revoked. He passed a school bus with the arm out and got a huge fine. Thankfully, no one was hurt. We told his doctor and he pulled his license. Mom hadn't been driving since her stroke and with Dad not driving, they couldn't get out to do what they needed to stay in the house. They live in a small town with few resources. Since they weren't accepting help, we had no choice but to move them into assisted living. They were not happy. The only place that could take them both together did not allow pets. My brother and I were not able to take the dogs in (I have 5 pets of my own) so via Facebook and a friend of a friend, we found a local Shih Tzu rescue that had space in foster care. The dogs have since been adopted together, so everything ended up okay for them. The only problem is my parents won't accept the change. I don't know if they really don't remember or if they are just being jerks about it but I get "where are my dog" calls all the time. They keep saying they are going to move out to an apartment so they can get their dogs back. Their home and vehicles have been sold and all of their bills paid off. They had a lot of debt so there wasn't anything left. They can't move out. They really need to be in assisted living but refuse to accept the change. My brother and I are so sick of the constant "dog calls". We've been patient. We've explained over and over why they need to be in assisted living, that the dogs have been adopted but they just can't or won't move on. Any suggestions? The dogs have been surrendered so there is no going back to the rescue. They are with a family and are doing well. You would think my parents would want what is best for their furry friends but they don't care. They want what they want and to hell with everyone else. Any suggestions about how to move forward with the dog issue? I am desperate for any ideas!

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If they are in mid stage dementia, they have lost their ability to reason and think logically. They also have little short term memory. Because of this, you can reason with them about why they are in assisted living, or that they can't take care of themselves till you are blue in the face and they will not understand. They may say they do in the moment, but in the next moment they have forgotten and will ask again. They probably don't remember that the dogs have been rehomed (thank goodness you did this for those little furry guys). Your best bet is to redirect the conversation, take fewer of their calls, or answer each question as if its the first time and be prepared to keep doing this over and over again. They can't help it. They simply don't and won't understand or remember.

Angel
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Perhaps getting them hairy stuffed dog toys would help. My mother's little dog used pee pads, though she often put them down upside down and the pee ran into the carpets so the dog went on the carpet as well. Not the dog's fault. She lives with me now (last 3 years) and, though she'll go out potty with my lab, I still keep pee pads down and she's almost 7.

There is no way people in the condition you describe should have a dog. Along with being unable to properly care for it, they feed it junk people food all day. My mother's previous dog was a barrel on feet, developed diabetes, went blind and died. When I inherited this one she was a whopping 28lb ... mother was always wailing she wouldn't eat her food ... of course not, she spent all day chowing down on junk. She's still a little (ahem) buxom, but a decent 18lb.
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P.S. Let the dog calls go to voice mail. They probably keep calling because they don't remember they just called. On the edge of a nervous breakdown from daily screaming phone calls I eventually changed my number and made it unlisted.
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