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My mom is mentally ill with dementia but aware of her actions.She was living with me until she started refusing to do anything for herself says she can't.wanting to be waited on even wants to go pull her up caught her doing it I have illnesses an its harming me.called her out on her lies an I said she's not using me or lying to me she won't even try to do anything for herself .She told me she don't lie all the time like it's ok.no remorse for the harm its causing me.she plays the health care to excuse her behavior to me or says she don't remember or sorry an does it still.So she looked at me an said she was gonna tell everyone that I abused her it's false I have a ton of people nurses etc.that said they would speak up for me.I informed the police of her lies an asked them an everyone social services etc.please investigate it I have nothing to hide .no one has yet so far .well she has no income from over payment my brother is in charge of her not me because I cut ties because their abuse lies but help him with what I can but not get involved because scared she still telling lies about me with no remorse.she had a over payment we didn't know so she has no income has to pay 14000 back to the gov so her checks cutoff an he can't find anyone to help us in anyway an told we have to take her back after rehab.I can't legally or mentally handle it or I will snap.I love her I want her cared for still.So we don't know what to do I am at a point that I need to her to be well cared for for my piece of mind.so help any feedback will be welcomed I am losing it.

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Talk to the social worker at the rehab facility. Make it clear that Mother cannot be discharged into your care. For you own health's sake you must refuse any responsibility for her. They may try to guilt you. They may try to insist and imply you have a legal need to do this. No. Hold your ground. She cannot be discharged into your care.
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Talk to the social worker at the rehab place. Say that there is nobody to take care of her after she is discharged from rehab and they have to figure it out to see what needs to be done. Period. Make sure that you have an attorney for you to protect you and your rights. Some states do have filial laws in place and you don't want to end up paying for her care. Don't be afraid to let the social worker know that your mental health is on the frail side and she would push you over the edge.
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crysanlouie, arm yourself with all the information you can find about Dementia. It is not unusual for someone with this disease to tell untrue stories about others.

Scroll down to the bottom of this page to the blue section.... over on your left you will see ALZHEIMER'S CARE... click on that... now scroll through all the articles and pick out the ones that resemble what your Mother is doing.
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Crysanlouie, are you concerned about the Adult Protective Services/elder abuse allegations or are you asking about what to do to help your mom with her finances? It sounds like your mom was just threatening and took no action against you so you should be ok on that front. Hopefully nothing will come of it; it's good that you already spoke to people who know you both and can back you up.

If your mom is in rehab, talk to the social worker and business office at her current rehab facility. It would be nice if you and your brother could approach them together. Just be honest and explain as best as you can about what happened. Was it that she was on Medicaid before and received an over payment but cashed and kept the money instead of returning it? If you can clarify what your biggest concern is, then people might be able to help with advice.
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