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I was told that if I appeal their and medicaid's decision to discharge her they could make the determination and I would have no recourse but to pay for it.

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Becky todd, I am having a little trouble understanding your comments. It would be better if you could use mostly correct spelling and punctuation. As far as being age 60, as mentioned above, please note that Medicare does not begin until age 65 (unless kidney disease or disability applies). I hope you are able to share more decipherable information; I apologize for any misunderstanding on my part, but honestly I could not comprehend most of what you wrote. Please try again. Thank you for sharing. We all need help.
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From what I have read on this site and seen in person, is that taking care of someone in your home is a lot more than people anticipate. They don't take into account the total lifestyle change, the constant medical appointments, medications, side effects, depression that illness can bring, cognitive decline, no down time for yourself, their finances, their bills, their expenses, their sleep interruption, the extra cleaning and supplies, their laundry, changing, their hygiene issues, undergarments, falls, bathing, bed sores, their pain, resistance to care, your stress.....it's pretty intense, though, of course, we want to help our loved ones. I get it.

I might read a lot of comments on this site about family members caring for loved ones in their home. It's quite troubling. Even if you can get outside help to come in and help, it's still a huge responsibility.

I would also not count on your adult children helping. Often family and friends get scarce in these kinds of situations. They may even avoid coming over, though, I'm sure your children are great people. I've seen it before.

I wish you all the best in whatever decision you make.
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something not correct.
Im getting the feeling maybe she is not cognizent. they seeking a guardianship.
you at this point need to have her sign for Health care surrogate. Someone to be her patient voice.
fill out online rent a tablet if you have to type can she push send button.
go run to DCF or it is on line now.
Authorization of Represenative.
may have to find it in foodstamp section. but same sorry obomas snap benefit.
fill out doesnt have to be noterize but good idea. where says assigb
n authorize person to be interviewed on her behalf that is it.
will give you accesd to medicaid and authorization to apply for any needed benefits then. she needs a plan. what programs I told you about application for yr closes Nov. so get to it .
she needs oneway or other and this gives option of help . her family status seperate from yours. assess her a rental amt for room and she will income wise be eligible medicaid and foodstamps u can use to make her meals with.
that way when rehab done if she ready to come home will have longterm homehealth care already in place and nursing home if need be longterm. makesure you reapply every year.
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go to dcf on line put in application for long ter HBHCWaiver alot think this is homebound but it is homebased healthcare. you get aids mral on wheels etc. aids can do personal care. clran her room etc.
while you do this do the longterm nursinghome based. this will be skilled care.
yes if medicare she doesnt qualify for skilled care evidently they percieve her as skilled care only way medicaid pays. if she 60 or over this designed for her if not shows need by application. van only say no and you can appeal. but puts ball in your park.
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go to dcf on line put in application for long ter HBHCWaiver alot think this is homebound but it is homebased healthcare. you get aids mral on wheels etc. aids can do personal care. clran her room etc.
while you do this do the longterm nursinghome based. this will be skilled care.
yes if medicare she doesnt qualify for skilled care evidently they percieve her as skilled care only way medicaid pays. if she 60 or over this designed for her if not shows need by application. van only say no and you can appeal. but puts ball in your park.
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Sounds like the rehab facility says Medicare will no longer pay 100% and also says she cannot safely go back to her prior home situation, thus recommend another facility which can accept Medicaid. Jeanne is right, we need more info. If the patient is not capable of caring for herself, she must absolutely have paid caregivers. Its nice to think family will "take care" of her at their own home, but from her physical needs she will also need a home health visist (at the very least) several times per week. One single person, a retired person, should not be asked to sacrifice their 24/7/365 life of their own, to provide care for this patient. That sounds a lot like slavery. And this is coming from me who cares for my dad in my home (for now at least he does not require very much care, so I am OK but it is still a 24/7/365 commitment).
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I wondered why your cousin thought this. I would talk to someone who knew something for sure. Unless the state has guardianship or there are other things that have happened, I don't see why you could not bring her home when she is discharged. Is your mother able to make decisions? Or is she mentally unable to have input into her care? Normally the patient themselves gets the first say.

If she has Medicaid and she needs more time, would it not be perhaps beneficial to go into LTC until she is more capable?
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llobri, You might want to rethink the option of 24 hour care at home. It will place an incredible burden on your wife. And there is absolutely no guarantee that your grown children will be willing or able to help with your mother's care on a consistent basis.
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She is 87, had a stroke and a heart attack, physically she is doing well, some soreness on her left side but no paralysis and her speech is fine, currently she is sleepy a lot and not real clear mentally.
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No one has power of attorney, she is at delmar gardens in ofallon for rehabilitation but they have reported to Medicare, not Medicaid, that she has plateaued and will be discharged on Friday. We want to appeal because we think she would benefit from more therapy before she is released but my cousin said we shouldn't do that because if we do Delmar gardens/Medicare could make the determination that she needs to be placed in long term care even though we want to care for her at home, that sounds ridiculous to me. She will need 24 hour care but my wife is retired and we have 5 grown children that live near by, we have the capacity to care for her.
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Could you elaborate on this a little? Does someone have medical power of attorney for your mother? Guardianship? What is her impairment? What kind of facility is she being discharged from?

Why would you be expected to pay for your mother's care? Do you mean out of her funds? Do you have POA?

More details will help us help you more specifically.
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